Oscar Wilde once said “To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people just exist.” So, what does it mean to live? My mind immediately goes to “This is water” by David Foster Wallace and the importance of being awake in your own life. What does “being awake” mean? It means finding joy and connection in the mundane. How many times have you been frustrated in traffic or breezed through the grocery store not even acknowledging the existence of the human checking you out at the cash register? More times than I can count. That’s ok. It’s important to give yourself grace. It’s a practice, and we’ll all be a work in progress our entire lives. Some days you need the humanity of another individual to help wake you up and bring you back to joy. On the days that you can be that person and that energy for other people, please do it!

With practice, I’ve learned to reframe what might be viewed as the everyday inconveniences of life (most of the time, but they don’t always roll right off of me!) by finding the joy or looking for the humor in the really ridiculously everything went wrong days.

1. The Grocery store, CVS, and honestly anywhere with happy tunes are essentially night clubs in my book. Take your airpods out and listen, the playlists are fire and can turn any mood around. Singing and dancing in public invites others to laugh at you or join you. Both are marvelous and make going to the grocery store an absolute ball.
2. Commutes. People love to talk about traffic. Why do we love talking about things we can’t control? Why don’t we talk about how we use that alone time? I’m a horrible driver, but I’ve never been bothered by a commute. It’s a consistent opportunity to invest in what brings you back to yourself, whatever that might be. For me, it’s checking on people I love, belting out/performing a song, listening to a podcast, or finding funny shapes in the clouds.
3. Appreciate nature – whether you are in the car, looking out your window at home, or on a walk! There’s so much beauty, wonder, and awe truly everywhere if you open your heart and eyes. If you know me, you know that I somehow see at least 1 butterfly a day. More often than not, I see 10+. I still squeal every time.
4. Smile and say hi to strangers who you pass throughout the day. We all need humanity and you never know what that person might be going through. Use your imagination! Loneliness is at an all time high, and the smallest bit of kindness goes a long way. Also, you never know when a stranger might become a key character in your life?! It’s so fun to think that we don’t many of our key characters yet.
5. Every single day, even a really sad day, has levity and magic in it. It can be hard but create the magic by getting out of yourself – follow a curiosity, call someone you love or be kind to a stranger. It always helps. In its own right, I also think sadness is magical — one of our greatest teachers to push us forward. There’s so much magic in the duality of life if you’re willing to feel and accept both sides of the coin.
6. Be curious about the stories of the people who you talk to and meet throughout the day. We’re all unique and uniquely suited to contribute to the world. You can learn something from each person you encounter – no matter who they are. The greatest gift my grandfather gave me was showing me that listening, learning, and laughing with each person who crosses your path allows you to develop empathy to better understand people and the world in which we live. This in turn evokes curiosity and helps each of us make sense of the world and how we are best suited to contribute.
7. Take the long way! A close friend who I admire greatly for his sense of adventure and ability to be present sent me on an alternative scenic route on a road trip recently. I don’t tend to fact check or look into suggestions from people I trust. I just go for it and wait for the surprise. I can still feel the wonder from this view and confusion as to why we aren’t all on the scenic routes. In my opinion, it will always be worth the extra minutes to be shocked and grounded by the beauty of nature all at once.
8. Being thought of always feels good! When you read something, see something, or think of something that reminds you of someone, tell them!! Don’t overthink it. Be genuine though — I don’t support looking for any old reason to reach out to someone. When it’s authentic this is an easy way to make someone’s day and connect with people, including those you haven’t talked to in years. It’s also something we can all do to help mitigate loneliness which has been declared a global threat by the World Health Organization. Also!! Tell people how much it means when they’ve made you feel really seen. I have at least two of those to send tomorrow from the past few weeks. Lucky me!
9. Everyone is living their own unique experience — accept that, have compassion, use your imagination, be curious enough to try to understand, and be kind.. We can only control our reactions, which also means realizing that others reaction to us are about them more than us. No one is perfect and we’re all going through something (s), lol. That said, throughout the day, we pick up on the energy of other people and places. Realize what isn’t yours and RELEASE IT. Recently, I’ve found it incredibly healing to say to myself when I feel that I’ve picked up other energies : “please release any energy off of me that is not mine and bring back to me any of my positive energy that I may have lost.” I’ve also imagined painting a room with yellow hearts and butterflies to remove energy or little cartoon angels cleaning the space when I’m nervous about a particular place or situation. Works like a charm as does a hot shower when you get home from somewhere, something, or someone that made you feel off.
10. This is THE MOST IMPORTANT for me personally. Finding protected time for myself as consistently as possible is the key ingredient to unlocking 1-9. I’ve lost sight of this of late which led me to feel not so much like myself and to move through the world without my emma energy. The horror! We need low times because we learn so much from them. It’s ok to get lost, lonely, or confused. I believe responding with heart and resilience leaves us better off than before the low. I am back though, baby!! Finding time to take care of yourself is a necessity to being awake in my opinion – however that looks for you!! One size fits all is bullshit. It’s wild we are taught to honor our individuality, but also to please conform and fit in a box too. Makes no sense to me. Do you!! Listen to how you feel and what lights you up.

I’m happy to let people laugh and judge me (most of the time). I obviously spiral and am unhinged sometimes, but there is beauty in learning to accept the mess/the darker parts of me and the moments or actions that I may not be proud of. By accepting and sharing my mess openly, I hopefully signal to people who I love that they can share theirs with me too without shame so that I can help bring them back to themselves just as they do for me. Helping bring people back to themselves unlocks more love bugs moving through the world freely with silliness, joy, and a willingness to connect. At the end of the day, life is about relationships. I suggest reading 7 regrets of the dying when you lose sight of this.

Leaning into silliness, curiosity, and kindness is a much more fun way to live. It’s amazing what each day has in store when you are convinced that there is magic and opportunity each day that you wake up. 💛

Daily Magic Journal 8.27

I woke up a happy little ball of love this morning at 640AM, which is my preferred time to wake up assuming I’ve gone to bed by 11PM. There’s so much day to enjoy when you wake up early and oodles of time for a long Emma morning.

This morning, I journaled for a long time — gratitude journal, productivity journal (game changer when I actually use it!), free hand. Then, I wrote a birthday card and a thinking of you card for friends who lost a dog. Then, I came up with a beautiful vision for another snail mail scenario for another person I love and admire. It’s so fun to have time to write letters of love and encouragement as well as send little things to people you care about. To be honest though, this is something that I have and always will make time for because it makes me so happy. I’m really grateful that this brings me joy and that I genuinely expect nothing in return. Thank you to Ruth for teaching me to love unconditionally and in a way that feels genuine to who I am. Although it probably isn’t normal, I used to have to fight the words to say I love you when ending meetings sometimes. It’s always been my gut instinct. It’s sometimes shocking I haven’t had an HR violation. My boss and I hugged good morning everyday at my job in DC. I love her. I should have lunch with her next time I’m in DC and maybe work for them in NYC?! Always digressing and coming up with potential paths. I just think it’s so cool to express gratitude and love unconditionally as much as you have the capacity for and as long as you prioritize loving yourself in the same way first. Which today includes getting my tooshie to the apple store to address my broken ipad which I love so much.

At the apple store, I saw a classmate from high school, who I could’ve easily ignored, but I decided to talk with her for a bit. We didn’t talk about much of substance, but I hope she felt supportive energy and acceptance from me. She’s been through a lot, and it’s important to show people kindness especially when all of Richmond is probably judging them for something. Shit happens, be a lover and use your imagination. Theres always more to the story, and typically it’s none of your business anyways. It’s not your experience to judge. Instead focus on how you react, hold space, and support.

I went to Target to buy a book called “The Hidden Power of the Five Hearts”, but it’s not out yet. Oopsie! I did a pre order and sent to Ainsley’s apartment in NYC since i’m sans address but know i’ll be there. She told me that she’s going to start reading and that her aunt gave her “The Women”, so I marched back in and bought that book especially because juju mentioned it the day prior. Then I sent a text to our group text with Raj saying that I’d like to start a book/ documentary club with the 3 of us. Our friendship has range: we know we’re wild little things and have always had deep conversations about all aspects of life. Why not up our learning a bit too? Raj refuses to read the book, but we’re all going to watch “The Turning Point” on Netflix which is about the cold war. So much synchronicity, last night I learned about a podcast about the cold war that talk about the theory that Scorpions song was distributed to the USSR youth by the CIA who had a hand in prompting the fall of the Berlin wall. So much to learn. It’s so nice to feel genuine curiosity. I can’t wait to drag A & R to exhibits, sound baths, and whatever I can get my hands on in NYC to expand thinking, love, kindness, and acceptance. It also gets my juices flowing on what’s next for me in a really fluid way.

The whole day has been magic, but holy moly how fun is it to have a long conversation with a stranger who quickly becomes a friend??!! I went into Loveevolve to buy those little put-abouts that say “LOVE” and then on the back you write in what you love the most about the person. It’s become a favorite gift. I found a bunch of other little treasures, but the biggest treasure was my conversation with Presley. We talked about Richmond, life, our families, New York, business ideas, and the ethos of their company. Her mom started to sell “love” scarves when she was going through her divorce. So much beauty comes out of pain. I always remind myself of that when I’m going through times of change sprinkled with loneliness, sadness, and confusion which has been much of this year, to be honest. It’s been such a happy amazing year of growth, adventure, laughter, love, and self acceptance too? Duality! Ok back to LoveEvolve. People bought the scarves to “wrap someone with love”. Their manufacturer could only produce swaddles in Covid, so it pivoted into wrapping newborns with love. Her mom then realized that there was so much around the space of addiction, therapy, healing, etc, but not about starting life with so much love. Our most formidable time is 0-3. Perhaps this explains why kids are so different within the same family? Parents are going through different things through different seasons of life, so how do we support them? Their company is all about this support – selling d2c and directly to hospitals. What a dreamy mission. I started crying as we were talking because I’ve always said Ruth is my greatest gift. So much of my heart, soul, and spirit comes from Ruth because she is who was around me loving me for those 3 years. I am so grateful that this has allowed me to move through life (or begin to again in recent years) with more gratitude, joy, hardly any anger, and no resentment. She showed me unconditional love which has allowed me to do the same. Presley teared up a little too, so it was ok (haha). She got my number and told me to let her know when I get to NYC. I look forward to getting to know her better. She gave BFF energy. Maybe I can even help her and her mom with the business? You never know! A pinch me moment for certain.

Prior to this little exercise in creative juices, I took a long walk and a dog ran right towards me. I am a firm believer that dogs, babies, and young children are drawn to peoples energy. It’s fun to feel my Emma energy. Things are flowing, and I feel like a magnet. Such a delicious day – who knows what tomorrow will bring outside of botox and the dentist. Sounds boring, but I doubt it will be. xoxo big hugs and so much love. ILY, Emeline

Daily Magic 8.28

I woke up one tired chick yesterday after not much sleep on Tuesday night. Instead of being frustrated, I am grateful that I couldn’t sleep. Weird. Why? I felt so excited about my life that I could combust. Did I get a job? Do i have a place to live in NYC beginning next week? Am I in a committed relationship? Nope! Much, much better. I trust myself and am allowing myself to play — following my creativity and curiosities to see what might come out of it with an open mind, no expectations, and zero attachment to outcomes. It’s this intensely peaceful feeling and trust that it’s all about to fall into place in a really genuine, beautiful and fun way.

The gratitude for this feeling energized me in spite of exhaustion to show up “awake” at a slower pace. I reflected on the night before and how I saw the number 23 repeatedly, so I looked into that. 23 is considered the luckiest number and a love letter from the universe reminding you to trust your intuition and have faith in your abilities. Feels right, to be honest. I’m drawn to signs and have always been curious about what they might mean. I don’t fully subscribe to anything, but I’m curious about anything that reaffirms connectedness.

After a beautifully slow Emma morning, I walked into the botox room and saw an angel made out of empty botox cans (and whatever else) in the corner of the room and awards in the shape of a butterfly. I then talked with Shelley and Victoria who work there at length about skincare and somehow life before I got a baby bit of botox. Shelley loves Austin, and she is looking to have a pop-up there. As usual, I had an idea and someone for her to meet. So, I texted my facialist in Austin who might be one of the sweetest souls on the planet to see if they could connect. It’s a beautiful gift to use your network to help others with zero personal agenda. I am grateful when I am able to follow through on helping someone. It feels really good when I do what I say — whether it be what I told someone else I would do or what I told myself I would do. Humble brag, I finally dealt with EZ pass after 2 months on my to do list.

Next I walked into the most thorough dentist appointment of my life. They were so incredibly kind, informative, and loving to be around. My dad has been raving about this dentist, so that’s how I ended up there. While the care was amazing and I’m glad they referred me to the ENT who it sounds like I need to see, the biggest takeaway is that they feel the same way about Dad as he does about them. I’ve certainly seen my Dad’s magic, but I sometimes think it’s easier to display your magic and kindness to people who don’t have expectations of you. He’s been wildly successful, but in small everyday instances perhaps it’s easier to push his ego aside and show his kind gentle side which is really who he is. What a gift to hear this from a stranger. A moment like this makes me proud to be his daughter. This resonates with me more than any amount of public recognition for his accomplishments and success because this is a recognition of his soul and his humanity.

In spite of three hours of sleep, I found myself quite happy and able to show up kindly. I’ve been with my mother more in 2024 than 2013-2023 combined. While it’s not natural and I’m excited to get to New York this week, I trust that I am always in the right place at the right time. Instead of leaning into the bad weather, I decided to get us into Celladora wines which is a funky natural wine bar/restaurant in the fan. I enjoyed her company and wanted her to feel kindness from me and to know that I’m going to be more than ok. It feels good to feel like myself and to be able to show up authentically and lovingly for the people in my life.

As always, there were amazing tunes throughout the day reminding me about my vitality and silliness. Also, I don’t have a signature really. So why don’t I start just drawing in smiley faces, hearts, and butterflies to spread a bit of joy? I can’t take credit for that the PA this AM tipped me off to that one. Another beautiful day for Le Emeline.

Daily Magic 8.29

A few very simple things happened on Thursday morning that immediately started the day with an extra dose of joy.

1. My mom told me goodbye while I was finishing my Emma morning. I was feeling particularly rested, peaceful, and certain that wonderful things are happening for me and around me. Then a few minutes later, she walked back in and said I just need to give you a hug. So, we hugged and I giggled. She seemed calm and happy. It was a good reminder to not underestimate how healing it can be for others when you’re gentle and leading with your heart vs. ego. I’d told her the night before that I was moving to New York next week. I must’ve said it with conviction because she didn’t and hasn’t asked me many questions which is rare. It sounds weird, but this was the ultimate show of support for me.
2. Two friends reached out to me : one with a picture of a bumper sticker that said “have the day that you deserve” and another a meme about bangers in the grocery store. I simply adore loving quotes and grocery store music, so it feels good that people think of me as they enjoy small moments like this out in the world.
3. I read a lot on Thursday morning. I read a NYT article about loneliness followed by the HBR special edition on Generative AI. My mind was moving a million miles a minute with ideas, connecting the dots, and really big questions as we shift into a new digital age. I think nearly everyday about how we’re technically more awake than ever but we’re lonelier than ever. Just like anything, I think we have to go through it to get over it. I think we’ll adapt with AI – perhaps allowing AI to take over mindless tasks and allowing more time for us to truly be awake in our lives — thinking deeply, feeling deeply, connecting intimately and finding more time to be adventurous. Those are the things that a computer will never be able to do. I believe that the AI age will shift us away from leading with ego and more towards leading with heart which genuinely excites me. I read an article back in February with the same spin. I imagine that i’ll end up doing something in this space. I’m not sure what, but my sense it that this might be where I end up contributing. 

The best part of the day though was being in the hair chair. I love any visit to the hair salon, but Richard is special. His salon is in the same exact spot as the salon my grandmother went to every Tuesday and Thursday. Not only that, but Richard trained at that salon and remembers my grandmother. He showed me the brush he still has that he’s sure he probably used with her. The clips he used were yellow, my favorite color. The dye looked like a brain before it mixed with another. It’s kind of wacky that something that looks like a brain ends up being the killer of my grey hairs (bless up!). Conversation flowed, and I learned so much about Richard. He’s incredibly multi-faceted — a musician, a fighter, a trainer, a hair stylist, and an overwhelmingly kind soul. Not only is he fabulous, but April his assistant is too. She used to be a computer scientist. She worked in salons while she was putting herself through school. She loved the community of it and doing hair. She ultimately had the courage to devote her time to what she enjoys vs. what is expected and painted as a “great opportunity.” Great opportunity for what? To make more money, but be asleep and not feel community. I learn so much from the two of them every time I go into the salon. Three key takeaways:

1. Why am I diminishing myself to be one thing? I don’t need to have one why, one job, one passion, or one talent. I can be both a strategic business mind, a creative, and a healer. Look at David Solomon – he’s the CEO of Goldman and also a DJ. I need chaos to be focused and thrive. It may not make sense to other people, but by being myself and allowing myself to be multi-faceted and seemingly “unfocused” my creativity will flow allowing it all to fall into place. I’ve always found that I’m more focused and successful when I’m doing more at once, making decisions as they come, doing things last minute and winging it. I did the Kolbe Test which actually validated all of this. I always am bothered when people say oh that is so so she’s done really well at X or she has a great husband or she’s really pretty or he’s gay. There’s nothing wrong with having one association with someone (it’s human and normal conversation), but it does trigger me sometimes. Our triggers tell us more about ourselves than anything. First, I don’t simply want to be Emma she works here or she dates this person. I can be multi-faceted like D-Sol. I bet if we asked we’d realize more people are more than what’s on the surface. If we talk about it maybe we’ll encourage one another to lean into being curious, multi-dimensional and more awake. The bigger trigger though is I want to be known for my character above all else. Our character is our legacy. I want my association to be how I make people feel, how i live with joy, and how I’m always trying to be better and kinder. To that end, I have three distinct memories that knock me off of my feet:
   • I was in Austin in March. I’d been at a wedding and stayed for a week. I caught up with so many people and did all of my favorite things that I had no voice by the Wednesday after the wedding. I was in my flow doing a lot at once. I was out at the Proper with my friend and a guy she was dating at the time and his friends. I was talking with one of the guys, and he turned to me and said “this might sound weird but there’s something disarming about you that makes me feel immediately calm and at ease.” I was being my silly, spicy and gentle self all at once. He saw the gentle though, which has been more often the case in recent years.
   • I was at the beach with my friend and his college friends. I’m often made fun of for “being fancy” — which if you know me well you know that the better I get to know myself the less I care about any of that. That side and part of me is definitely there, I like doing nice things and definitely spend too much money. That’s a small part of me though. I care way more about surrounding myself with “awake” people, helping people, learning about people’s stories, adventure, and silliness. My friend stopped the conversation and said you realize that that might be true, but that Emma has one of the kindest souls of anyone I know. I almost cried on the spot. The irony is that he, similar to me in many ways, also has an incredibly kind soul. He also struggles to push ego aside (hard to do b/c he’s effortlessly a genius, connector, and hard worker), but I know he’ll be known for his heart.
   • Lastly, I went to go to a yoga class with an instructor my friend recommended to me. When I got to class, I told her that he recommended her. He’d only met her a few days prior. She remembered him and told me he was so wonderful, such a kind soul, and loving energy. For me, I was beaming as a friend. I’m still beaming from this interaction. I was so proud that a stranger could see that in my friend. This is more valuable than any person knowing how much money you’ve made or where you went to college. Kindness, vulnerability, openness, and acceptance are something that we can all give. And man do we all crave to receive it! Character is what will define us in the end. We all have a chance at crafting that. I think we all have unique talents that we should leverage to contribute to society, but I think what we do have in common is that we want to be seen and connected.
2. Richard was talking to me about being lost, and told me that for him it was meeting his wife that changed everything. He said it was a period of excess for him and that he was a mess, so he wasn’t thinking too hard about it but he knew he was lucky to spend time with her. She was magic and she inspired him. She inspired him to take care of himself and invest in himself. We inspire others to be more authentic and to believe in themselves by doing it ourselves. When I’m in this flow, I’ve had friends reach out and tell me they made a change after watching me. This was a good reminder to get back to myself b/c I’m able to love with full self when I”m in that space. Of course ill have days where I need to be brought back to myself by people who intimately know me, but it’s hard to ask for help. Even though I know when I’m off and what to do to get back to this place of flow, I need a friend to inspire me sometimes (just like Richard needed). I’m eternally grateful that I know what to do to get back to me. I know that i will lose myself again. I’d like to think it’ll happen less and less and on a smaller scale. At the end of the day, the most important relationship is with ourselves. I hope to be in a relationship where we support and love one another unconditionally – rooting for one another on our path together and part, constantly adapting and loving all the different reinventions of one another.
3. Introducing people to someone connected to another era of their life that their nostalgic about is always a good idea. I introduced Richard to a friend whose grandmother he knows and admires. He thanked me endlessly for that and spending my day with him. When you take the time to get to know someone and not take them at face value you have an opportunity to learn more than you could imagine from them. I’ve never been very interested in fiction. I think it might be because I think there are so many beautiful stories to be heard as we go through a seemingly mundane day. In a disconnected world, I think we need to figure out how to build community through everyday interactions. My brain is constantly whizzing about it, but I think it starts by encouraging one another to be awake to our experience and the experience of the people around us.  I left the salon happy as could be and came home to chill. Nothing too eventful, but a beautiful night of relaxing. I wrote a few notes – including one where I may have overstepped. I’m human though we’ll find out what happens. Mom did text me that she had a happy day and took the scenic route to Baltimore. Joy is infectious. She caught it that day. This made me smile. I hope your day was magical. XOXO

Daily Magic 8.30

8/30 was several days ago because i was out there l-i-v-i-n-g. I’m energized by this creative pursuit, but I haven’t quite figured out the right balance between reflection and inspiration/play time. Perhaps I’ll be like Louis Litt a la Suits and record daily magic notes. Time shall tell!

8/30 is one of my most magical and oldest friends birthday.I think of her as a “princess of joy” — she has the most infectious kindness, laughter, and love. She’s been this way since we were children. I’m lucky that I’ve had her as a teacher my whole life — including being everyones best friend (truly I wish i’d recorded her rehearsal dinner), going to every wedding, and always laughing really really hard. She’s one of the most beloved people on the east coast. It’s no shock this is the case. She oozes love, kindness, and joy which attracts anyone with a pulse to her. I found a letter this morning that I’d written on 8/30/22 to myself that I believe to be a bit of an ode to her and mirrors 2 years later how i feel today : “There is nothing more beautiful than letting go and feeling free. I am proud and excited about who I am, but I also can’t wait to see who I become. I don’t yet know how I’ll contribute, but I feel awake and alive to the learning process. I look forward to a lifetime of being a princess of joy (like Hillary and like Pop) — sharing laughter, love, and affection all over the globe. Connecting with souls and laughing really hard.” How cool to realize that the essence of who I authentically am now is consistent with two years ago in spite of so much change. This kicked off a slower paced day, which can still be magical. A few moments of note:

1. I reached out to a friend to thank him for helping bring me back to himself. In the past, I maybe would hesitate to send something of this nature. I think when you start to feel fully at home within yourself, you start to just do you and let it flow with humor and grace for yourself. I’ve learned to accept and love that I am 1. very verbose (clearly) 2. express gratitude frequently and genuinely in silly ways (i.e., Have a happy day, hunny bunny) 3. love my people very hard (i.e., I believe in accountability, but I do not tolerate bad self talk and want my friends to love themselves as much as I love them. I often feel like my heart is going to explode sometimes for the people in my life.) 4. that I can both have depth, compassion, and also be the silliest care free person in the room (range, baby!)and 5. that I genuinely think that we’re all connected and are exactly where we’re meant to be. In that moment, my friend was hungover when I sent a long Emma text. I’m glad that my gratitude met him in a moment when he was fragile. Lord knows I’m fragile hungover. I was glad I could provide a little bit of humor and advice to help him that day. Taking care of people has always been natural to me, and I feel like I’m entering a phase where it’s incredibly effortless and energy giving for me because I’m putting on my oxygen mask first.
2. I’m addicted to my phone, and I hate it but I believe that I am getting better. I started reading The Women, and I love it. There’s magic in reading, and I am so grateful to have rediscovered it. I got lost in the book for about 2 hours. There are so many lessons in it so far, but the three that stick out to me are 1. we can all be heroes. Your character and kindness are what will make you a hero 2. We are united in war because we are faced with the universal truth that our time here is temporary. When you realize that life is short due to loss, you will be “awake” — learning to be true to yourself and having the courage to say how you feel, and live how you say you will. and 3. life is supposed to be fun no matter what — let it be that way.
3. Moving forward with conviction without a plan and without a doubt that you’ll figure it out is a gift and privilege. I booked an apartment in New York for the fall, and it feels like the beginning of a new chapter. Earlier in the summer I felt like I’d end up in New York because I don’t know where else to go. Now, it feels like exactly where I am supposed to be after reconnecting with NYC friends and 10 days in the Hamptons where I continued to meet interesting people who piqued my interest and got my brain going a million miles a minute. People make a place, and man does NYC have a lot of people — making for a larger surface area of opportunity for luck. Here I come. I think i’ll be there for a long time, but if it doesn’t work or something else presents itself I’ll just rip the band aid again. Friends often remind me that I have had the courage to turn my life upside down many times and can feel when something isn’t working and have the guts to change it. Adios Richmond!
4. Spending time with people you love with more time behind them than ahead of them is a gift. Learn from their experiences, gratitudes, and regrets so that perhaps you don’t have the same ones. Ruth and I went to Inside Out 2 followed by dinner at Mekong (best of Vietnamese in Richmond). Inside Out 2 is a cartoon about emotions, but I think the message is relevant for all ages. Essentially, we have many emotions and beliefs — some feel good and some don’t. We need all of it to develop who we are. Humans aren’t good or bad. We simply are. There are parts of ourselves we like better than other bits, but the sooner we accept the messiness the more authentic we’ll likely be. Discussing this at Mekong, I could sense that it was my turn to lift Ruth up a bit. I told her my plans and that I had no idea what I was doing but that I just needed to go ahead and go with full trust that it would all unfold. She was beaming seeing that my focus was on me. She said she could sense a gentleness, calmness, gratitude, acceptance, and open heart. I told her enough about me. She might be the most magnetic human I’ve ever met with more positivity and gratitude than you might expect from her. She wishes she had traveled and seen the world while she could still move well. She has a beautiful imagination so she imagines the places she likely wont get to go to. I appreciated her vulnerability. My heart broke slightly wishing I could do more, but I am also encouraged that she feels like she can share more than just her bright sides with me. That said, while we’re having this conversation, I could feel the joy and wonder as she smiled looking around the buzzing restaurant. Duality! It feels small, but it’s magical to take her out in the world to take in new experiences. I hope that I’m soon settled so that I can do more things with her — being silly beyond belief and learning more from her. I’ve learned that when someone I love is struggling my instinct is to drop everything and take care of them (whether it be going on a cruise or something smaller). This typically doesn’t end up being good for me or them. I’ve learned that the people who love me most won’t let me do this anymore because they realize that I need to take care of me first which I now realize as well. Like I said earlier, I can feel that by prioritizing me I’ll be able to take care of people I love in a more authentic and sustainable way by loving Emeline. They won’t hold me back. This is magical to realize and feel this kind of love and support in the moment.

Not a typical Friday night for me, but I don’t know what a typical Friday night looks for me in 2024. It’s been a less typical year, but perhaps the one with the most learning to date? Another day of magic to kick off a long weekend.

Daily Magic 8.31

There’s nothing more magical than knowing you are about to spend your weekend with one of your best friends. You know that you will laugh, likely drink too much, and that you will forget that you have a cell phone for much of the weekend. So, the biggest burst of magic was when Juju texted me that she would indeed be coming to Richmond. People are home, and Juju is one of my oldest homes. Knowing I’d see her put an extra pep in my step, I read in bed for a long time and then scooted off to the grocery store to start observing the magic of the world.

• Grocery store: I saw a little kid pushing a baby grocery cart in a matching american outfit with his mom. I smiled as he nearly wrecked into me. He’ll never remember this, but it made me excited to imagine myself in the story with a toddler — teaching them to enjoy the grocery store as much as I do. So much ahead of me to enjoy.
• Yellow Umbrella: I try to stay away from this $$$ store, but I haven’t been all year and want to support my friend who owns it. It’s a beautiful buzzing store, and I imagine quite successful. He and I aren’t close, but I am proud that he followed his curiosity for food and expanded yellow umbrella. It was always a cornerstone of community and quality in Richmond, but now even more so. How cool to be a part of everyday life and the community? The patrons were nice. I laughed with a stranger who seemingly had $2k in her cart, and the man who waited as I ran to get farm fresh eggs with patience. He was sweet when I apologized. When you interact a little, people tend to cut you a break and be ok with being slightly inconvenienced.
• We’re always in the right place at the right time: I’ve been in and out of Richmond since the middle of April. My aunt lives around the corner, and I hadn’t seen her until today. I’ve felt a slight bit of guilt because I haven’t reached out, but I decided that it was ok that I didn’t. I tend to be the one reaching out and keeping relationships going – even with some of my best friends. It’s ok to not always lead, and leave space for people to check on me or to just let life flow, bringing you back to one another. I was pulling back into the neighborhood, and saw her walking her dog. I stopped and we talked for an hour and had a really lovely conversation. Let life flow and realize you don’t have to be everything for everyone.
• Walk around U of R: I listened to World’s First Podcast as I do every week. This week is an astrologer, and one of the most impactful sentences was “we know what we know when we need to know it.” I think back on different periods of time and how I would respond or react differently now. I knew what I knew then and responded to the best of my ability. You’ve got to give yourself grace – reflect, but not so much that you’re not enjoying life and moving forward. I don’t like to dwell on things. I dabble in astrology, but I don’t fully lean in. I think like anything it’s information, and I do think we’re all connected – including the stars and the moon. It intuitively makes sense to me that your birth chart is a bit of a map of your soul. It’s interesting to learn about this. We’re all unique so it makes sense to me that we all have a unique birth chart? Why not learn about it? If it resonates with you, cool. If not, who cares! You get to decide that. I read the pattern most mornings. Not because I live by it, but I find that what it says resonates with me. I find it comforting, giving a little bit of an extra boost to trust what I already know about myself. That’s simply my experience. It was funny listening to all of this as I walked around and saw college students on their own for probably the first time. I often think about how people say you figure out who you are in college. I had a really good time in college, but I certainly didn’t figure out who I was. I think we all figure out who we are at different times and over and over again as we evolve. It was fun to see the nerves. I saw two girls who smelled of alcohol. A boy who seemed like a bit of a loner. I wondered if any of them felt lonely, and how I’d been so lucky to always have built in community for much of my life. On the flip side though if I’d felt loneliness earlier perhaps i’d leaned into authenticity earlier. Whatever. I guess my point is there is beauty in the timing of each of our individual paths. I hope all of those kids have fun, and that they are kind to one another. I’ve never had a tough time socially, but I do look back and wish that i’d actively been more inclusive of people who I noticed were maybe struggling a bit. That’s something I can try to do more of now.
• What goes around comes around: A friend thanked me for helping him. Quite simple, but it always feels nice to be appreciated. Gratitude is the greatest gift. I still can’t believe my life half the time, and I know that I’ll only continue to feel this more and more.
• Sidewalk Cafe to sleepover: Time to reunite with Juju. I was in a beautifully hyper mood. I showered quickly and tossed a dress on, knowing that i would be with the Toms for the rest of the night. Laughter and silliness = magic. We talked and giggled for hours. Julia, Zach, and Anne are family to me and some of my biggest cheerleaders. I’m always amazed how they see me as someone who can do anything and be anything. It’s also hilarious to slip right back into high school – spending the night at their house in an old night gown after way too much yapping and red wine.

There was so much good music throughout this day which reminded me to slow down and listen. A top notch Saturday.

Daily Magic 9.1

I did not feel magical when I woke up Sunday morning. Ouchies. I woke up at JuJu house which is fun, but I had plans for my morning. I knew I’d get back in bed for most of the morning before heading to the pool. The magic in this particular hangover is that I usually just deal with it and say oh well to the day, but this particularly morning I was frustrated. I felt like there was so much living and so much I wanted to do with my day. Too much to be excited about to be nauseous. I wanted to write. I wanted to be out in nature. I wanted to be silly and laugh with Juju. Even though I didn’t seize the day, it felt good to realize that I want to feel well each day because I genuinely feel so excited about what each day might bring. Sounds silly, but this might’ve made Sunday the most magical day of the week.

I’m grateful that I feel so excited to bc creative and curious every day right now. I was able to spend the day at the pool with JuJu and Anne. I hardly talked or at least not until my excedrin kicked in. I just listened and was entertained. I laughed and listened. I saw more friends who I love. I saw adults who I’ve met at weddings and seem enchanted by me. You can sometimes feel the confidence and magic people feel in you when their energy shifts around you — telling you to stay in touch and hugging you kindly. It’s cool when you see and feel your sunshine mirrored back to you. It was another lovely day in a lovely place with lovely people that ended at Juju’s house again watching Love is Blind UK and giggling with Juju followed by some quality Emma time at home. Emma time included reading through old notes as I go through things in Richmond to get ready to go to NYC. With all the notes i’ve kept from friends over the year, the theme is consistent that having the courage to be myself leaning into the softer side of me vs. my ego will unlock how I will contribute to make life just a little bit better. Candidly, I’ve always been afraid to show this side of me because I can often get overwhelmed by it or worried it’s too much. In the past I’d be embarrassed to share the below, but I’ve grown to be proud that people have seen this in me even when I try to present with my spicy and fiesty side first.

• A friend wrote: “You are an integral part of every group, team, friendship, relationship, unit (list goes on). You join. Because, without even doing it on purpose, you give so much light and life to others. You make people want to be better versions of themselves; you make an effort in places others do not; you bring people together in fun, creative, and exciting ways. You connect with people on a deeper level while always respecting their space. People will always gravitate to all these great parts of you.”
• A friend said: “You have the biggest heart and always remind me to check in on people and that there are things going on beyond what we see in the day to day and investing time in this way will make me happier and probably get me further in life.”
• A friend said: “you truly love the people you love with full self without even realizing it, and to me, that is the realest, rarest kind of love and truthfully the only kind of love that sustains and fulfills. Not everyone knows how to love that way but the amazing thing about you is just by being around you, you help others learn.”
• An old boss said “most of all I admire your genuine compassion for others and your bravery to do what you say you will.”
• Another friend said “Taking the time to figure out what you want out of career and life takes bravery and true self confidence. You are my role model!”

My friends amaze and inspire me daily, and I am grateful that I seem to have given a little bit of that back to them as well. If you ever are doubting yourself, please text me because we know my favorite thing to do is be a hype girl AND Keep notes that make you smile and encourage you. They have an uncanny ability to bring you back to yourself — highlighting and reminding you of who you’ve always been no matter how hard you might try to resist. Ask yourself if you want to be known for your accomplishments or how you treat people? Why not both? Another magical day realizing how fun it is to be awake following my curiosity, loving deeply and authentically, being creative, and giggling a lot along the way. Big hugs and so much love. Xoxo, E

Daily Magic 9.2

Today was simple, but quite magical. I slept until 1030am. Delicious. I ate healthy, and I didn’t spend gobs of $. Go moi! The more time I spend at #31. The more I come to love it and feel like I live in a treehouse. Sometimes, I find myself sitting in the massage chair in the sunroom simply looking at the trees blowing in the wind. Today, I saw the shadow of the trees on my book as I read for 2 hours. Giving into relaxation and letting go of what you should or could be doing with your time is magical. Follow your curiosity. I’m not sure what will come of following my curiosity, but i have a lot of ideas for potential paths right now. I’m curious to explore them all. I can always pivot again and again? Somehow every single week, I think of and find comfort in the title of a book I read in high school that i read: Do what you love and the money will follow. In other words, follow your curiosity and let the rest unfold. Sounds good to me. How is it so easy to lose sight of curiosity and lead with ego? Just because you can do something doesn’t mean its the right thing for you to do. Or just because you’re not an immediate all star at something doesn’t mean you should’t still pursue it if you genuinely find joy in it? Oh well, better to learn that later than never.

I ended the day with a 3 hour walk — soaking in the sun, observing the U of R kids, thinking about how it’s time to mend a relationship with a family member, calling a friend about plans in October and updating him on what’s up with me. I could feel his genuine excitement and belief in me. It’s nice when you feel friends genuine support. It gives you courage and conviction to do hard things and go fearlessly into the unknown. Then, I basically bopped about singing and dancing in public as usual. A seemingly boring day to some, but one full of smiles and peace. I’ve always enjoyed my own company, but I find very at home and at ease in it. Smiling and laughing with myself. Big hugs and so much love. XX, E

Daily Magic 9.3

I misplaced an important document, so it’s 1130PM right now. Looking for this took much of my evening. If it’s meant to turn it up it will, if it’s not it won’t! I always figure it out without much fuss. The chaos can drive others crazy, but as long as I accept it and quietly move through it on my own what do they care? Today was simple, but delicious

1. Reading is cool : I felt genuine sadness that I finished The Women. What a beautiful story of love, reinvention, and the duality of life. It makes the question Is all fair in love and war make quite a bit of sense. We all have to fall apart to find ourselves and there is so much power in sharing our stories to help others. I can’t wait for Ainsley to finish and discuss. I can’t wait to continue to be an avid reader. I also love that it disconnects me from electronics
2. Fall is fabulous: You look tan is essentially the same as saying I love you to me. That said, today was the first glimpse of fall and it was magical. The butterflies were swarming, phone catch ups were soul giving, and the weather was perfect. Before I even realized it, I’d walked 7 miles and had no idea.
3. If you have conviction, they’ll have conviction: I told my mom I might just get in the car and see what happens. She does that in The Women. Why not Emeline? She laughed and said only you in a quite loving way.
4. Face what’s making you anxious first: I called Dad to schedule some time to hang. I hope that I have the same conviction with him so that he feels confident and not worried.
5. A burst of Sucoo: I was a little busy body tidying, running errands, crushing personal admin, laundry, etc. It felt effortless and fun. Who knew!? It helps that I currently feel like I’m living in a tree house. You walk through the living room and see the leaves blowing in the trees on a bluebird day.
6. Random check ins from friend will always make me smile.
7. Let it flow, baby: I’m hoping to be in NYC by Tuesday at the latest. Sooner is preferred, but I’m fine with whatever. I think its important I tie out loose ends, enjoy my last bit here, and see people who I love and appreciate.

Before I know it, I’ll be off on my own again as I have been pretty much since I was 18. I usually am only here 1 or 2 times a year. I imagine I’ll go back to a similar cadence, but I’m not sure. I’ve been thinking about Ruth a lot, and maybe I should write a book about the story of her life with her. I’ll be back for her birthday October 1st. We can talk about it then. What a treat. I wrote this in 15 minutes. I’m sure I missed some magic, but that was plenty and I’m sleepy. Sending so much love and big hugs. XOXO, E

Daily Magic 9.4

9/4 was bound to be magical because 9/3 had a lucky ending. I nearly submitted the lost passport form last night, but I decided to wait a bit in case it turned up. I lost a passport drunk in Dallas right out of college and am not certain how many Ls I get on this one. Well! Lucky me, I will not be taking that L. I found my passport underneath a bucket hat in my room right before I went to bed. I love a bucket hat and this particular bucket hat has a fun story. I was at an Orioles game, and I spotted the most delicious Orioles bucket hat. Instead of simply looking for it online like most people would I strolled right up to the stranger and gushed over his hat. I offered to buy it, but the sweet man gave it to me and told me it would look better on me. Admittedly, I do look great in a hat so I didn’t argue with him. We bought him a beer and went on our merry way to go eat fresh crabs. The thought never crossed my mind, but apparently there were prayers for no lice in my bucket hat. It was all good, and I proceeded to have a magical day which included going into a strangers house to meet his cat and take a shot. I’m lucky that I have a good people instinct and haven’t been stolen. It was the lovable hat. It has no name yet, so I think that I’m going to give it to a true Orioles fan to enjoy. Anyways, I woke up very late, and I had to haul my tooshie 5 minutes down the road to my eye doctors appointment to start the day.

Eye doctors appointment: The nurse who came and got me did not seem too thrilled to be there. I decided she needed a little humor and fun. I was glad that we felt like friends, and her mood shifted by the time she was done with me. It just takes the smallest bit of kindness, warmth, and interest to help another human feel seen and able to get through what might be a tough day.

Catch up with friend: I learn so much from my nearest and dearest. This particular day I was given a tip on how to better communicate via text so as to not overwhelm the receiver. My #2 character trait is positivity so I get excited and tend to have a lot to say, but my #3 character trait is adaptability. I may joke that I’m not going to chameleon, but I always want to be better at how I communicate so that I can be more kind and concise. People are busy even when I am not. Man, It’ll be good to have a job again, and not have as much time. I’ll miss that soon though I am sure.

Lunch with Dad: I hadn’t seen him for a bit, and I was feeling a bit anxious. We had a good conversation. I can feel that he’s ready for me to be settled and perhaps a bit worried about me. While I do feel that from him, I also feel that he trusts that I will figure it out and he cant wait to be even more proud once I’ve landed on my feet job wise. I was candid and honest about where my head was which feels better than sugarcoating. I’m always nervous, but I never regret being truthful and vulnerable.

Facial: Even if a service is amazing, I tend to only be a repeat customer if I connect with the service provider. I enjoyed my facial and learning more about the facialist, but I don’t think I’ll be back. The price was right. The location was convenient. My face looked nice after, too. She was perfectly nice, but I was a little bit offput by her. She’s certainly kind, but it seems that she doesn’t believe people change. I might suffer from toxic positivity, but in general I believe that anyone can be and become anything if they have a good relationship with themselves. We were talking about living in small towns and seeing people from long ago. It can be tiring and I don’t always want to do it, but I don’t write anyone off for who they may have been a decade ago. She is more of a believer that if you disrespected me then why would i talk to you now. I appreciate that, but I tend to want to believe that when people are unkind or disrespectful its about them – not me. So, why not show them kindness so that they can heal and realize I accept them for the good, the bad, and the ugly? It’s probably easier said than done, but it’s a more delightful way to live in my opinion. Kill them with kindness does truly work — if it’s genuine. Fake kindness doesn’t do a thing. I spoke up a bit about this during the service and she agreed. I’m glad I’ve gained the courage to do things like this vs. just going along with it. I don’t always, but it feels nice when I do.

Music at Maymont: I was given tickets to see Band of Horses last minute. I struggled to find someone to go with me, but I last minute thought about Aunt Weezie when I drove past her house. I’m glad she was with me. We had a nice time even though we did go way too early. We talked about hiking, spontaneity, forgiveness, and state parks. She encouraged me to keep leaning into my love of nature and explore the national parks. I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately, and I plan to do at least one a year moving forward. I’m going to have to figure out camping, too which sounds fun to be honest. I’m glad that we had so much quality time. Life just flows sometimes. We went from not connecting all summer to having two really nice times back to back right before I leave.

I was planning on going alone which I was nervous, but also excited about. Life keeps going. Do the things you want to do whether or not you have someone to go with you. I do want to take myself to a concert alone by the end of the year. I do movies alone and will eat at a bar alone, so concert feels like the next step? Why not listen to good music alone? Band of Horses and the openers were all really good. I knew more songs than I realized. It would’ve been lovely alone, and I had crush on one of the openers. I could’ve become a groupie had I attended sans relative. Kidding. Anyways, I am so glad that I went because live music reminds us how important it is to feel free and how important it is to connect. How cool is it that people come together to sing and dance along next to people they have never met? We’ll likely never meet, but we’ll all always share that moment. Like sports, music brings us together and helps us realize that we’re more alike than we are different. What a gift. This immediately ignited me and set me off on a mission to spend more $ going to live concerts, comedy shows, and other experiences that connect me beyond just another dinner and drinks night. When it’s an old friend or someone you need quality time with I think there’s nothing better than drinks and dinner (I love that too), but I think sometimes you just need to have fun and feel free without talking so much. And I LOVE to talk, but I’m realizing I love to be quiet too. I’ve learned to be quiet and listen and will likely continue to work on this forever.

Life is really fun, but it can be hard as it gets more complicated to leave room for spontaneity. I am grateful for the spontaneity in my life right now, but I’m determined to never lose it. Even with a husband, job, and kids, I expect that I will leave room for spontaneity — for me, him, us, and all the different combos. Spontaneity is important. To be spontaneous vs. reckless, I think it’s important to follow my curiosity vs. what i’m trying to escape. That’s the key distinction. Another magical and beautiful fall day. I’ll miss my tan, but I am ready to get on with it. Time to take NYC by storm, which includes an Usher concert on Tuesday in Brooklyn. Release control and surrender to the flow, baby. Sending myself big hugs and so much love. Can’t wait to be a bottle of sunshine amongst the jaded. lol. XOXO, Emeline

Daily Magic 9.5

Who says you can’t go out on school nights? Concert and a few beers, and I was up at my magic time 640AM. Who says you can’t do it all. Also, I know every night could be a Saturday night for me right now. I had a phase this summer where I was accidentally having ginormous Mondays. Oops. No more because I genuinely look forward to having obligations. I do think I’ll take the spirit of enjoying everyday into life of obligations, too though. Why can’t I go do something on a weeknight and still get plenty of sleep to wake up at my magic morning time? I can! I woke up and started Emma morning. This particular Emma morning included some facebook messaging with a stranger about what could be the perfect apartment for me this fall. I’d eat the cost of what I paid for the other one, but I really like his energy as well as the much better price and inclusion of a parking spot. Fingers and toes crossed that this one works out!

Day made before I left the house: My friend, who is also a family friend that I’ve gotten the joy to get to know better this summer, sent me the sweetest meme. It instantly made my day and led me to wrap myself with sunshine when she told me that I live like this:

1. Shine bright; your light is needed.
2. Embrace your journey, every step counts.
3. Nurture your soul with positive thoughts.
4. Love yourself unapologetically.
5. Your vibe attracts your tribe.
6. Celebrate every moment, big or small.
7. Let gratitude be your daily practice.
8. Speak kindly and intentionally.
9. Find joy in the little things, they add up.
10. Move with purpose and passion.
11. Trust that everything is unfolding perfectly, just as it should.

Miriam: I went to see Miriam who is an amazing seamstress to take in a this beautiful chocolate brown dress that I bought. I have to admit i look quite thin and stunning in this dress. Note to self: Manifest a black tie event in NYC in the fall to look like a friggin snack. The most fun part though is that I used to work with Miriam. I worked in the shoes at the store and she was in house tailoring. She’s silly, and we used to giggle. I’m grateful that I know her know her. She’s about to turn 75 and having her bday in Bolivia. Her son isn’t speaking with her. We all might be seemingly different, but so much of our pain is the same. Many members of my family also aren’t speaking. I am glad that she shared this with me. It was nice to feel like she also thinks it’s ok to be vulnerable without feeling any shame or guilt around family members taking space to heal. Thank you, Miriam.

Post Miriam, I slayed productive princess hour. Every once in a while, I think shit I am Susan Coogan’s daughter — my personal admin is close to being in perfect order. I’ll close it out tomorrow and address a budget/finances head on. As well as figure out where I’m leaving. That might be good to figure out ahead of a Monday or Tuesday departure?! If not, I’ll just drive north and see where I end up a la The Women. That said, I really want to go to Usher Tuesday and the Deepak Chopra yoga on 9/11 @ Bryant Park so I think it’ll work out. I’m excited that I’m not rushing off so quickly and close things out gracefully and responsibly. Not only am I doing all of this, but I’m finding time to move my body and be outside daily. I also have tons of plans in Richmond that I’m genuinely excited about it. Life’s a runway baby. The better I take care of my self – tackling things head on that release anxiety and doubt, expending most of my energy on me, eating healthy, and sleeping well, the more energy and genuine desire I have to have loads of fun being silly. I suppose it will always be doing it all once for me to be functioning at my best. Looks tiring for some but the most peaceful and restful for me? I’ve experienced joy, solitude, connection, and intense focus all in the same day lately. What a gift.

Courage to move forward: I reached out for a coffee that I’ve been nervous about with my sister. A lot has happened between us over the years, and there is plenty of pain. I think there’s more love than pain, and I am hopeful that we’re on a path towards repair. I hope we can forgive one another and focus on moving forward — respecting, accepting, and enjoying one another.

Conversation with a stranger: As i strolled back into the neighborhood around 745pM, I met a woman I’d never seen. We talked for a bit, and she told me I looked beautiful. Give compliments. We all need them.

A beautiful day to realize that I’m genuinely ready to just let go and move forward with my life. I feel so fearless and ready to dive into whatever is next — ready to release any doubts I have about what I’m capable of, how much fun I’ll have, and what I deserve. What a treat that so much of my story is unwritten. Love you endlessly. XOXO, Emeline

Daily Magic 9.6

To be perfectly honest, I woke up slightly anxious on Friday. Searching for a sublet via Facebook groups is not for the faint of heart, nor is addressing your finances/creating a budget. I do subscribe to the belief that whatever you feel most anxious about is the task that you should tackle first. For me, this was figuring out housing and deciding how i’d navigate. I was cranky spending time on facebook messaging folks and wasting my day with a screen, so I decided to trust my gut and release control. This means going up there with no where to stay, but leveraging yesnomads, word of mouth, and perhaps spending some time in the Hudson Valley until leases start in the city. I believe I’m considered gullible because I trust people say what they mean and genuinely believe that there is good in everyone. Yes, everyone — even the trouble kids who turn to violence in schools. Why are they turning to violence? Loneliness? I think we need to be treating the symptoms (gun control) as well root cause (mental health crisis). We’ll see where I end up, but it feels nice to let go and be comfortable with a lack of plan. Secondly, it feels good to hold myself accountable with a budget and a newfound determination to be financially responsible. I’m ADHD, and my impulses tend to show up in my spending which I can do a better job managing. I’ve started to ask 2 questions will this bring me joy and will this move me forward in some way? Both important, but it’s a balance. If I’m shopping too much for material items, it’s typically a clue that I’m avoiding a bigger issue. So, alas, I was able to emotionally regulate myself out of anxiety by just simply acting. It’s important to just go sometimes. I’m quite analytical, reflective, and curious, but I hope to always be able to act quickly trusting my gut and that it’ll all work out how it should.

Duolingo: I’m on a streak. I’ve often said I find it so boring that I only speak one language. Well, Emeline. Do something about it! I’ve been committed to duolingo for the past 2 weeks, and I am planning in enrolling in Spanish class when I get to NYC. I want to become fluent in spanish so that I can 1. prove to myself that it’s never to late to do something hard 2. pushes me to travel to spanish speaking countries to practice and 3. helps from a career perspective.

Errands: Passport Renewal is off in the mail, baby. It feels amazing when something is off your to do list that has been sitting there for several months. I also got a passport card (valid for Caribbean, Bahamas, Mexico, and Canada). It was only $30 more and I thought it might be nice to keep in my wallet. At the flip of a coin, I’d love to be able to spontaneously just pop on a plane and go whilst out and about without even going home to get a suitcase. This might be a pipe dream, but getting a passport card felt like it could enable a bit of this behavior. I’ve said this for a while now, but I genuinely don’t believe that I’ll live in one place which has led me to believe that I’d like to work remote. Ideally, NYC will be home base with 6 weeks in Colorado and 2 weeks in Austin in the winter.

• Skiing: I’ve had an insatiable appetite to become a better skier. I’ve found that my friends are either already great skiers or not at all interested in becoming skiers. So, alas, it will be an expensive solo pursuit. I’m determined to become a great skier as nothing feels more free to me than zooming down a mountain. I honestly love it, and I’m excited to commit to the sport this winter. In the same vain, I have plans to keep up my commitment to tennis in New York.
• Tennis: Great workout and quite fun. I started taking lessons in Richmond over the summer, and I plan to continue this pursuit in the city. To be honest, I could not care less about golf. I enjoy a topgolf experience, and I love to whip around in the cart drinking. I’m not interested in the sport, and I don’t envision myself ending up with a golfbro. Even if I do, I still don’t think I’d take up the sport. I’d rather spend the time feeding my own curiosities. 
• Boating: Who doesn’t love a boat? We’ve all seen memes about the magic words “I have a boat.” While I don’t think I’ll end up with a golfer, I imagine that I will end up with a boater. Who doesn’t want to dabble with waterskiing, wake boarding, tubing, and cocktail cruises? All sounds fabulously adventurous to me. I started to thinking though. I went to camp. I know how to canoe, kayak, and tie knots. Why wouldn’t I get my boating license? This gives me the ability to rent boats and create a lot of fun. Perhaps, one day i’ll buy myself one as well. What will i name her? I think the best boat name I’ve come across is still “Heelin’ Time”, which was a boat we went on in Fig8. Cute Tarheel theme. The man ended up also letting us stay in his extra house for a week. I hope that I’m a fun old person who offers things like that to people I meet who I know would enjoy it. Give people the gift of spontaneity if you can.

Walk & Talk: When I’m not feeling full magnetic Emma energy, the best thing for me to do is move. So, I embarked on a 7 mile walk in the sunshine to bring me back to Emeline. I talked to Ruth for a while, and we decided that I’m going to write a book about her life. I’ve had psychics, shamans, and therapists tell me before that I’m going to write a book. I used to laugh at this because my sister is the creative one. I am the business school one. Screw that. Why can’t I be both? I am both, and I am meant to share all my talents with the world. I won’t dim my light due to overwhelm and sheer wonder that I have so many gifts. I think we would all realize we have so many gifts to share if we stopped putting ourselves in boxes. Again, act and move forward. Writing the story of Ruth’s life feels like a wildly productive use of time and a beautiful gift. I’ve always loved biographies. They tend to be about people of power and stature. What if I wrote the story of a seemingly ordinary life? What if sharing Ruth’s story helps us realize that there is magic in the mundane and that we’re all leading extraordinary lives?

Friend Catch Up: I caught up with Milly, a friend who I adore and didn’t expect to be such a key player in my life. She is consistent, thoughtful, and fun! It means a lot to me when a friend checks on me and wants to spend time with me. I am usually the leader of the friendship, so it feels nice when people create space for me to take the backseat for me. This is an incredibly nourishing love for me. It was a wonderful catch up that immediately kickstarted a really good mood.

Old Friends: I went to a cookout at Halsey’s house which was lovely and low key. The piece of the night that made me feel loved was watching Halsey go Momma bear when I accepted a facetime that she may or may not approve of. She’s protective of me, and I am grateful for her fierce support and spicy nature. She, like most people in my life, want to see me happy and cherished. I cherish myself, and anyone else will be a cherry on top. I’m also grateful that I trust myself above else. I’m able to observe, understand reactions, and take in opinions all while knowing I will know what the best and most genuine way to move forward is for me. This is a really cool feeling. This shockingly wasn’t even the best part of the night! My favorite part of the night was when I was the last one there with their family. I bounded with their son and helped put him to bed. I could see his parents lighting up as they watched me with him. I know in my heart that I want kids, and that I’ll be a wonderful mother. I know it’ll be a wonderful adventure that I will somehow handle with ease. So, I have a fertility appointment on Monday to get the ball rolling there. Again, move forward and create what you want. 

Having fun Alone: I came home and giggled on the phone for a bit. Having fun is so much fun. Then I put the tele away and fired up my new ipad and started the perfect couple. It’s so fun to be totally engrossed in your own world and enjoying your own company. Being alone feels like solitude these day. In the past, I think it was more anxiety inducing. I’ve always craved it, but I think I now genuinely love it. I love it all being around people and also being alone. Every moment we have a choice, so why not choose to have fun whether you’re relaxing with yourself or out in the world.

A beautiful start to my last weekend in Richmond before I head off to New York. I love this little treehouse apartment that Mom has. I bet I’ll end up in an apartment in the trees in New York. Can’t wait. Also, I think I might switch to being Emeline in New York. Why not?! Sending hugs, sunshine, and so much love. XX, Emeline 

Daily Magic 9.7

Even though I stayed up late and had plenty to drink, I woke up a happy little butterfly. It was a grey day, and I decided to simply enjoy relaxing. I genuinely have learned to enjoy solitude – reading the news, writing, reading beneath a Scarlett sky, scouting out things to do in NYC in September, plotting concert attendance, and just simply being.

Where will I be in 5 years: Ruth told me to take some time to think about where I want to be in 5 years and to be specific. This was a really fun exercise, and I had a lot of fun with it. Above all else, I want to feel how I feel now – free, peaceful, busting with unconditional love, silly, and in love with my life. I am so grateful that I have the courage to close chapters and begin new ones. I’ll never be in the same place 5 years from now. I trust that I’ll always have the courage to act and allow life to evolve. I’m grateful for the guts and conviction to create a life uniquely suited to help me create a meaningful and happy life. I wrote down 40 things re: where I want to be in 5 years. Why 5 years though? Start now. Here are a few highlights:

• financial stability and responsibilty — use $$ to give thoughtful gifts, throw parties or trips to bring people together, and give back to community
• photograph from the wine store I love in West Village up in my NYC apartment
• in love with a beautiful little adventurous family
• 1-2 national park camping trips
• great skiier, boater, tennis player, squash player, and avid walker
• trips with friends, family, etc
• in the midst of planning a really fun 40th and wedding anniversary parties
• commitment to adventure and play
• living in new york, working remotely and getting paid well and enjoying job
• commitment to creativity and kindness, blossoming into a career as a writer, thought leader, and speaker (the start of my Oprah era)
• Weekly live music date with husband and annual big trip the two of us
• living between new york, colorado, and wherever we decided to spend the summer — creating the life we want vs. what is expected!

Letters: As I feel shifts in my life and chapters ending, I like to write letters. I wrote a letter of gratitude to a friend who has been a key character in this chapter. I’m grateful for how this year is unfolding and how much I’ve learned. I always say home is not a place, but people. My friends have been my home this year, but my forever home will be myself. I remember in April I almost did an Instagram post honoring the people who I feel are home. I hesitated, and I then proceeded to get lost over the summer. I think perhaps I hesitated because I knew that I need to feel at home alone in solitude as much as I do when I’m surrounded by my nearest and dearest. I’m not sure how I got so lucky, but I feel at home. It’s a gift to be able to be and just relax with yourself.

Nature: It wasn’t the most gorgeous day, but who cares. During my time in London, I learned that you can still enjoy a grey day. Don’t let the weather stop you from enjoying the day. Bad weather is a bad excuse to not be awake that day. I went for a stroll after my day of relaxation. It was an incredibly peaceful walk. It rained and I felt so calm and happy walking in the rain. I listened to music and a ted talk about how we should be chasing a meaningful life vs. a happy life. This hit home for me immediately. She shared 4 pillars to lead a meaningful life:

1. Belonging: Relationships where you are valued for who you intrinsically are. This springs from love – just like everything does in my opinion!
2. Purpose: Using your strengths to serve others. This is what you give and share with the world and is the “why” that drives us forward. This one is still open ended for me, but it can be multi-faceted. Perhaps it’s as simple as spreading kindness, love, and joy to help more people get closer to feeling they belong.
3. Transcendence: When you are lifted above the hustle and bustle and you feel connected to a higher reality (art, nature, writing). Connectedness is my #1 strength so this pillar is a big one for me as it helps with Pillar 1 and 2 for me.
4. Storytelling: The story you tell yourself about yourself. This one is big, and I am grateful that I’ve fallen in love with my story. I’m a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. I have immense gratitude that I don’t have an ounce of resentment or regret. I’ve learned from all my experiences which have shaped me thus far. When I reflect back, I realize life is unfolding for me beautifully and exactly how it should. We all have our own stories to create and share, and I hope that we can all have the courage to create our narratives vs letting the narrative happen to us. My #2 strength is positivity. I can put a positive spin on anything because I genuinely believe there is always a positive. I am grateful that I don’t speak negatively to myself. When a relationship ends, I’ve never had a conversation with myself wondering if I am good enough. I know this to be rare, and I am grateful that I don’t have negative conversations with myself. I do sometimes on the career front, but we’re working on that too. We’re all value simply because we exist. I believe this to my core, and I won’t let anyone speak ill of themselves in my presence. We all need hope, belief, and encouragement. We’re all worthy of love, and I hope to help as many people as possible realize this. This happens in the little moments where you choose to lead with love vs. ego. Love is undoubtedly the answer in my brain, and I don’t care if it’s viewed as cheesy or childish. I know this in my hear to be the truth.

Silliness: I went out to fanboy and then jungle room. I had a hilarious time with my friend Beau. He’s creative, kind, and fun as hell. We had a blast dancing and giggling. The last time we hung out was Juju wedding in 2021, so it had been a minute. I’m grateful that I don’t hesitate to reach out to people who I enjoy but don’t know as well. I love new friends and experiences. I’m excited to reach out to people in New York. I could easily fall into spending time with my nearest and dearest only, but why not get to know more people better who i’ve met before and enjoyed?! Life is short, expand your circle, and expand your life. I’ve figured out a nice balance of alone time, old friends, and newer friends. I hope to bring this with me to New York.

The night ended with hot dogs, hugs, and losing one another. I called a friend and talked briefly. I got the sense that he and I are going to drift apart which is ok. New chapter, baby. Time to get on with it. Sending so much love, courage, and hugs. Wonderful things are happening for me and around me. Anything is possible when you lead with love. Love you all so much! XX, Emeline

Daily Magic 9.8

I woke up early, and certainly a tad hungover. I went to bed a little bit frustrated because I was made to feel like an imposition to a friend who said “am I allowed to go now?” to me on the phone. I was drunk, but I understand why this hurt my feelings. I’m a really wonderful, consistent, loving, fun, and kind friend. I’m able to let this go, but should giving consistent unconditional love and support make me ever feel like an imposition? It shouldn’t, but I know in my heart that it’s overwhelming and hard to receive unconditional love if you aren’t quite there with yourself. I let it roll off of me because It really isn’t that big of a deal and I know that I’m reading into the interaction. I have a really hard time letting my guard down and letting people love me. I find it much easier to give, so I give too much and often don’t leave much space to receive. I know that I can overwhelm people with how loving I am, but I will keep doing what feels right to me. I won’t change who I am, but I will adapt for the people who love and support me. My number 3 strength is adaptability. I’m always changing and evolving, and I know that when I care about people I can be there for them in a way that feeds them without abandoning my authenticity. I went back to sleep for several hours, and I woke up on the right side of the bed around noon and hit the store then watched the US Open.

Courage to ask for help: Tomorrow is going to be a hard day for me, so I reached out to my nearest and dearest asking them to check on me. I’ve learned that when I ask to be supported, it happens. My friendships are my greatest gift, and I put a lot of effort into my friendships.

Phone catch ups: I strolled and rolled calls one of my favorite activities. I’m tired though today, so I sat in a chair in the sun and let myself rest. It’s a gift to listen to your body, and do what you need vs. what you think you “should” do.

I came back home, relaxed, and ready to take on the last few days closing out this chapter of transition. Thank you for my positivity and for coming back to myself. I’m excited to see who and what the future holds. It’s going to be an amazing chapter. Big hugs and so much love. xoxo, Emeline

Daily Magic 9.9

I woke up early and at peace. Grounding myself in the morning is essential even if I do wake up feeling like rainbows and butterflies. I had a nice Emma morning – mind movie, journaling, reading, and writing my birthday cards to myself. I write myself often. I find writing and re-reading these notes tend to ground me. I’ve always been a fan of snail mail. This week I’ve found myself writing more to myself than to others, giving my magic and love back to me. I’m glad I’ve trusted this vs. giving blindly to others.

Appreciating the different chapters of life: This year has not been at all what I expected. From the outside, it might seem like I haven’t accomplished much. That’s ok because I know that I have and that this chapter needed to happen in order for the next chapter to begin. I’m grateful that I trust myself and am able to tune out any judgment. I know who I am, and that I can and will be whoever I want to be. When I left Austin a little less than a year ago, I left in a chaotic whirlwind. I was excited, but felt somewhat sad. My therapist suggested that I write a letter to Austin. Once I could put my tray table down on my flight to London, I started to writing to Austin. It was a letter full of gratitude for the place and the people who I learned so much from. I started crying, which I wasn’t expecting. I realized that Austin gave me the courage to be gentle and to move forward without a plan. Later, I wrote a letter to London. London taught me to explore, go out alone, spend time outside, reach out with ease, and most importantly I can create whatever life i want. Committing or settling down doesn’t mean that my life will be boring or that I will lose my identity. I saw so many beautiful examples that taught me that being open to a committed relationship will be my greatest adventure. I’m a firm believer that with more security comes more adventure and play – for me at least. I’ll just find someone aligned who believes life is adventure and that you don’t lose your individual identities/priorities when you enter a relationship. Kids also don’t need to become your full identity. It was wonderful to realize I do want all of this, but I just want it to be a bit more like what I saw in London. Stay interesting. Don’t stop your life or curiosity for a partner or a family.

Mind Movie: One of my energy healers suggested that I create a mind movie where I create a video with music and words for different categories of life explaining what I want. The idea is that you watch it daily, and It’ll enter into your life. It’s fun to do, and you can feel the joy when you watch these things. All it takes is a little belief. It’s never seized to amaze me how I am blindly positive or delusional? It’s nearly been a year of not working, but I still don’t have a shred of doubt that I’ll weasel my way into a job that I enjoy which will pay me handsomely. Secondly, I’ve been the only home friend not married or engaged for a while. I’ve never once thought something is wrong with me. I’m grateful I don’t have the self worth talk with myself when things don’t work. Nevertheless, I have no doubt that I will have the most fabulous husband, and that it will happen when it should. Thirdly, I’ve always assumed that I will have plenty of $ living a really fun life — taking friends on trips, giving my time to communities in which I live, simply enjoying life and helping anyone around me to do the same. Lastly, this is more recent but I know that I’ll have children. I trust that I’ll be a wonderful mother and that I’ll somehow move through it with ease, likely with the help of a nanny. This was a huge part of my upbringing and I consider it a gift to have multiple adults influencing you. I am glad I suspect I’ll be able to afford it It’s fun to pair all of this with answering the question “where do I want to be in 5 years?” All of these things are beautiful and specific, but more than anything I hope to still and maybe even more so feel at peace in myself, authentic in how I contribute to the world, and alive finding moments of joy and silliness.

Impact of grounding and leading with love: I went for coffee at lamplighter with my sister. I was nervous, but it was a really nice start to a new chapter for us. I am grateful that we had the courage to speak honestly, and that I felt at home in myself throughout the conversation. My triggers are no longer my triggers, and I am at peace with who I am and how I move through the world. I said to myself repeatedly in the car “Let my love move before me.” I think that love filled the conversation as we both worked to push our ego aside. Love will always prevail, no matter what has happened between two people. This was encouraging and special to feel.

Kind Strangers who value connection: I went into computerology to have my tres old mac updated. She could do it, and today! I was worried that I would have to leave for a bit, and that I would have to delay my arrival in NYC. Marnie remembered me from another visit, and we talked for a while. I commented on a song, and she told me she saw them in high school. She worked at record store in Alexandria where she was often given free concert tickets. She’s lived, and seems to keep living. Great energy. We started talking about the yellow coffee truck across the street. She told me that it was stolen about 6 months ago, but they redid it and were kicking again. I walked over to get a lemonade at the truck. The yellow truck which had a sign that said “Wake up it’s a beautiful world and we have coffee.” Ok. I immediately love it here, and I am going to love these people. We chatted for a bit about the theft and why they started to do this. The reason was present. They did it for connection. No wonder I am attracted to a food concepts. It’s an opportunity for everyday connection. Small moments of joy make up a life of joy.

Later on, I had a fertility appointment. I’m not sure what I’m looking for, but I figured I might as well take control and figure out what’s up. She was great, and I a glad that I have the time to look into this and start the process. After this appointment, I took a very long walk. The weather is insane right now, so it’s a crime to not take a long stroll. Prioritizing connection and being outside today did mean that i was going to have a whirlwind night. My hope was to pack and to be ready to leave for New York around noon on Tuesday. As I switched out my summer and fall clothes, did laundry, and cleaned the house, I realized it was ok to pivot. I decided that i want to slow down and stay one more day. Staying one more day will allow me to peacefully finish packing, address the things i’ve been avoiding (budget and $$$$ needs — my life is in perfect order for once apart from this piece), and reflecting on this chapter before I jet off.

I’m glad I gave myself this option. The usher concert would’ve been amazing, but arriving to New York without anxiety around having avoided $ plan and peace/gratitude for the chapter that’s ending will feel even better.

Daily Magic 9.10

It’s now 9.13, and I candidly don’t remember Tuesday very well. I remember being grateful that I took the extra day at home to prepare myself for my next chapter. It’s ok to slow down, and take the time to not rush into things. I’m grateful that I slowed down, had my last Osaka dinner, and felt relaxed as I packed. I watched “The Perfect Couple” while I packed. I finished the show while I ripped the band aid and figured out my finances. All in all, a lovely day where I felt so much excitement. It takes courage to move forward with uncertainty. I’m proud that I trust who I am and what I am capable of and have the confidence to rip the band aid and trust that I will figure it out!

Daily Magic 9.11

The day I moved to New York. I didn’t intend to move on 9/11, but I’ll never forget the day that I moved up here as a result. I left Richmond around 10ish, and I even made time for an Emma morning, a quick shower, and a pop by Stella’s Grocery before I hit the road.

Pit Stop: I stopped by a friends house to drop off a little Emma love, and to water some tomatoes. Admittedly though, the Emma love was just as much for me. I like to share my gratitude for the role different people have played in various chapters of my life. I tend to find expressing genuine gratitude is a really beautiful way to close one door and open another.

Coming into NYC by car is a new move for me, and it’s candidly probably an expensive one. I’ll eventually take the car out to CT and back south when I go back for my doctors appointment. I arrived around 422PM, and checked into my enormous room (so rare!) at the Virgin hotel with a huge pool and amazing out door space. My London chapter started with an amazing Virgin flight, so it feels like kismet that this chapter is starting with Virgin too.

Bryant Park: I scooted up to Bryant Park for Deepak Chopra meditation and yoga. I could not have fallen into a more ideal start to this chapter. Reflecting on 9/11, being in community, and meditating with Deepak Chopra! It was a 30 minute meditation starting with these questions: Who are you, what are you, and what is your purpose. He talked about gratitude and talked about letting it all flow through you. Then he went through the senses – including meditating around the sounds of New York City. Beautiful sounds. Meditating helps you be incredibly awake and appreciative. What a gift that I have all 5 senses. When you feel your own body and pay attention to your surroundings, you realize just how connected we are and how much bigger it is than us. I felt so at ease, peaceful, and certain that this is going to be a beautiful chapter. The word yoga means to join or to connect. I’ve been thinking about getting back into yoga and this was the perfect way to guide me back to it. At the end of yoga, I went to Ainsley who gave me a beautiful letter written to me. I love written word, and I love that i’d been in NYC 45 minutes and I’d already seen A. Good friends are such a gift. We then scooted to my hotel, and sat on the rooftop and caught up. When you’re with a best friend, you can lose track of time. I lost track and was very late for a party uptown!

Uptown: I went uptown to go to a charity cocktail party. Within seconds of arriving, I saw so many people who I love. What a gift. I could not be more grateful for my New York family. I am so lucky to be close to my friends family. The Williamsons are special, and I am really grateful to have them in my life. I saw and made plans with old acquaintances, and even talked with a new friend for a long time. I had never considered it before, but I realized that I should perhaps entertain working in relationship management with High net worth individuals at a hedge fund. It’s fun that within an hour I’m already exploring paths that I hadn’t thought about. I made the right choice coming up here without a plan, and it feels good. I’m also excited to get involved and volunteer in New York. I am going to start mentoring a child. I did Big Buddy in college, but I wasn’t mature enough then. I think about her often, and how I wish I’d stay in her life. I think I should reach out to her and see how she’s doing and who she has become. I’m excited to live somewhere, and to get involved in the community. What a gift.

Stumble Inn: The young crew went to the bar, and had a nice long catch up. It was fun, and they encouraged me to come out to Long Island tomorrow for the golf tournament. Why not? I have the time, and I enjoy everyone’s company. I also think it’s important to show up for people you love whenever you can.

Big Cwilly: I am so impressed by her big heart, curiosity, and kindness. She’s a ball of energy, and I’m so grateful for the inclusivity and generosity that she shows me. The kindness of those who have been through it never ceases to amaze me.

I came home at the end of the night, and I was so grateful for all the magic I am already feeling in NYC. I made the right move coming up without a plan, and letting it just flow. So much love and hugs for my big curious adventurous heart. Bet on me always. Biggest hugs. XOXO, Emeline

Daily Dose of Magic 9.12

No surprise, I woke up a little hungover. I had a nice Emma morning, and I walked over to Paper coffee and got a delicious healthy breakfast and coffee. I came back up to rest a bit, and I talked to a family friend on the phone for an hour. She gave me some tough love, and the next thing I knew I was seizing the day. I took the train out to the golf tournament, and I saw so many people I enjoy and enjoyed a beautiful day. Nothing sparks joy like connection and community. I high tailed it after some quality time back into the city to see a friend from the London era. We had a beautiful and soul giving catch up. I am so grateful for new friends, new perspective, and I can’t wait to meet her NYC people. It was fun walking to dinner, and acting like I knew what I was doing.

I just moved! – It was really fun telling people I moved yesterday, and waiting for their reaction. People are lovely and willing to help. I am going to lean in and ask for help. People are happy to have me here, and I happy to have them!

The thrill of hailing a cab: I love to hail a cab. The thrill of hailing cab is fun beyond belief to me.

I had a nice nightcap before bed reflecting on how grateful and excited I am. What a gift to have the ability to take a chance on yourself and create a life you want vs. reacting to the card you’ve been dealt. I love new beginnings. I love new chapters, but isn’t every day a chance to start a new chapter? Great start to NYC Emeline. Big hugs and so much love. XOXO, Emma

Daily Magic 9.13

Unfortunately, I woke up feeling like le garbage. Not self inflicted hangover garbage, but regular old sick. I wanted to feel well, and be ready to seize the day in the city. As the Rolling Stones once said “You can’t always get what you want. But if you try sometimes, well, you just might find you get what you need.” I spent most of the day in bed finishing the Perfect Couple and Emily in Paris.

Birthday plans: I love intimate, quality time with friends, but I am sick of my $ being spent on expensive dinners, especially in New York. There are obviously great restaurants, but I’d like to explore more than just food. Realizing this, I decided that instead of a birthday dinner I want to do a birthday boogie. So, I’ve invited friends and acquaintances from all corners of life to Vandelux in Brooklyn for my birthday. The more, the merrier. Let’s get my life in New York flowing and bring people together. Never know who might hit it off from a friend, business, or love perspective?! I also invited a crush which always adds a fun element to a birthday. I’m grateful that I’m starting to shift how I spend money and time. I’ll still eat out and drink plenty, but why be in New York if that’s all that you do?

Sushi counter: I took a walk down to the west village to check out this concept that Wyndham told me about. It’s becoming abundantly clear that I need to start the summer roll concept that I’ve been thinking about since I happened upon it in London. No time like the present. So, Wyndham and I are going to do a summer roll menu planning night in the next week or so. She’s finishing up chef school, so it’s a perfect match.

Job Hunt: I used my down time to come up with next steps. I’m feeling really energized, and confident in both my approach and the substance of some opportunities and potential paths. I’m ready to just act, and stop reflecting so much. I’ve realized being multi-faceted is the key for me. I can find a $250K+ role that feeds my brain while simultaneously writing a book and starting a business. I know that might sound insane, but it’s sort of how I’ve always functioned?

Helping a stranger: The card for a bday present flew into the street. I could’ve kept walking, but i ran for it. I grabbed the card and ran to the lady who lost the card. She was surprised and smiling at my very simple act of kindness. It’s so easy to help others. Just do it even when you don’t feel well. Not too long after this exchange, a stranger told me you are beautiful as I walked by. I don’t get creeped out by this as many do. I prefer to say thank you, giggle, and move on. Who doesn’t love a compliment? I certainly do, and I don’t care where it comes from as long as I’m not freaked out by the person.

New game to play in the city: I could not for the life of me open the water bottle that I’d purchased whilst parched. I was planning to ask a stranger to open it for me if I couldn’t get it. This could be a fun way to strike up a conversation with a hottie? I got the bottle open, and saw a sexy man 3 minutes later. Unfortunate timing, but I’m glad that I have a new game to play. Why not turn a daily inconvenience into an opportunity to meet someone new? Always in for the reframe.

To mitigate the chaos, I’ve decided that I won’t focus on finding a full time apartment until 2025. Let’s get me settled and in a routine first and foremost. It’s fun to get distracted by real estate, but that’s not going to lead me to any sort of meaning. I do think I’ll probably end up in Brooklyn though with outdoor space after my Nolita stint if I had to guess. We’ll see though. It’s a next year problem. Not the most fun day, but the day that I needed. We’ll see what today brings. It might be a similar day, but we’ll see. It’s important to listen to your body. Big hugs and so much love. ILY, Emeline XOXO.

Daily Magic 9.14

For the past several years, I’ve loved having Emma time on a Saturday until about 2PM. This Saturday was a slice of that heaven. I woke up not feeling great, but hopeful that I would be ok enough to not be a total sloth. I walked down to mamas for a latte and a quiche. I love that place, and I find that it’s not too terribly overpriced for NYC. I extended my stay for one more night which is indeed a luxury. Ultimately, I decided that this served me much more than a stint in Hudson or The Hamptons this month. I’ve decided no more jaunts until I am gainfully employed making $250k+. I feel certain that I will come together, and that I will also be able to pursue starting the Summer Roll QSR that I know will kill it in NYC. I came up with a plan of attack for reach outs starting monday, and courses to start taking to explore product management, etc. I can’t wait to get out there and start contributing to my own well being again, and hopefully at a company which helps others too. I relaxed watching the blind side (an all time favorite) while doing all of this. It was a perfect productive princess day. I prefer when I also work in a long walk, which I haven’t done yet in NYC. This is not my norm. I usually walk 12ish miles a day when in a large city, but I listened to my body. It’s telling me to rest or I will get sick soon. I also felt a weird tingle randomly in my toes? I hope that’s nothing.

Volunteering: I signed up and kicked off the process to become a mentor in NYC who helps promote self worth. There is no better use of time than promoting self worth. I am grateful that I’ve come to a spot where I trust, accept, and love myself without conditions. What a gift. We all struggle with it, but some more than others. I’m grateful for the opportunity to mentor an underprivileged youth to help be a support and help them to believe that they are valuable by simply existing. We all have a unique gift to contribute to the world.

Bop about: Rachel came downtown to meet me, and bop around. It was a perfect crispy day, and it’s such a gift to catch up with an old friend. She’s a sweetie, and such a curious soul. I learn so much from here, especially how to be more thrifty. I’m trying to improve my relationship with money and be more thoughtful with how I spend. I’m lucky to have my Darden friends in NYC who make me better and smarter. Katie came later and joined us. The two of us went for a nightcap at Hotel Chelsea. It was such a soul giving and vulnerable conversation. We talked about mental health, healing, and what I wanted to do in this next chapter. I’m really proud and grateful to have friends who care so deeply about well being and the world around them.

I was home by midnight, and I knew I wouldn’t be hungover which allowed for time to enjoy Sunday which i’m quite excited about!

Daily Magic 9.15

I’m writing this on Wednesday (my birthday!), but I still remember the main lessons from Sunday. I had read an email in the middle of the night that made me quite anxious. I woke up and packed up my things with no idea where I planned to sleep Sunday night. I waltzed down to Maman for a latte and a slice of quiche, and I called my mom.

Ask for help and be vulnerable: I called my mom, and I talked about how I felt judged about where I currently am in life. I know that I am ok, and I believe wonderful things are happening to me and around the corner. I am very grateful to have a safety net to fall back on, but I get intense anxiety when it comes to asking for access to it. I started crying, and instead of judging me. My mom offered to help me, so that my anxiety would disappear. This is the greatest gift that she could give me. My heart still can’t believe that she lead with her heart, and problem solved to make it all go away. I am so proud and grateful for how she’s showing up for me and others right now. I’m so grateful, and I still can’t believe how much she’s helping me.

Celebrate the little wins: My car took forever to come around, so they knocked off the parking fee. Hello $100 I never needed to spend. We will take any wins.

Take an adventure: Once my car finally arrived, I scooted uptown to snag Rachel for an adventure. I am so grateful for Rachel’s spontaneity and desire to spend the day with me. I also low key love the courage and bravery that I have to drive in NYC. After driving to the Cotswolds with the wheel on the wrong side of the car and on the wrong side of the road, I can take on any US roadway. So, we scooted on over to the New Jersey side of the Hudson. I wanted to go back to the park I’d happened upon on my last drive to Darien. It was so fun showing Rachel, and roadtripping to Greenwich. We stopped for lunch, and then we scooted to see my family.

Amazing friends & family are such a gift: We had such a nice time catching up with Hank, Sarah, and Jack. We laughed, and we played with Jack. It’s fun introducing the people in my life to one another. Everyone was in a relaxed Happy Sunday spirit. I’m really lucky that i have family right outside the city, and who live in a charming town. After visiting with them, we scooted over to my closest family friends. GiGi is one of the most fun, welcoming, and enchanting people. Rachel was immediately obsessed with her. She’s so fun, kind, and welcoming. I am so glad to have a quasi mom in CT who has an open door policy. Come out here all the time! Bring friends! Play pickle ball! Use pool! She’s magic, and she can makes anyone she meets feel special and loved.

Find examples of who you want to be when you get older: Ginger’s open heart and warmth is exactly how I want to be as a parent and adult adult. I want to have an open door policy. I look forward to creating a home where I am constantly welcoming and inviting people over, offering people to use my homes or clubs etc whether I am there or not. I think I’ve always wanted to make plenty of money so that I can buy things for people I love that will bring more joy and spread more kindness. Money is a tool to spread love if you frame it that way. Joy is important and sharing with others is a gift. I hope to have a happy home full of food, wine, love, music, dancing, and silliness.

The day ended with coming back into the city late with Rachel. I ended up staying with her on the UWS. She is the sweetest thing, and the cutest/kindest host. She will definitely be a warm and inviting hostess like Ginger when she grows up. It was fun having a sleepover. I am so proud of her, her kindness, and how well she’s doing at work. It was a perfect end to the day. It started out not so great, but it ended wonderfully. Going for an adventure and surrounding yourself with people who love you will us boost the spirits.

Daily Magic 9.16

I didn’t sleep well, but I woke up happy. I seized the day, and I addressed the things that make me the most anxious.

Move big rocks first: I called and found out that there was no fire drill for me to be worried about from a tax perspective. I was talking on the phone with the woman helping me and I found out that she’s pregnant. She was incredibly warm, and she told me that she is being induced on Wednesday. My birthday! 9/18 is full of love, and I am always happy to share this bday.

I called my Mom to share the win with her, and she continued to offer to solve all my sources of anxiety. What a gift.

People who see you and believe in you: I took a long walk along the reservoir while I chatted on the phone with a family friend and advisor. We talked about the meaning of life essentially. He told me that he doesn’t worry about me, and that I can do anything. I’m smart, dynamic, kind, warm, and have a special energy. What a gift to boost the belief that I am already luck to have in myself!

Productive Princess Hour (s): I moved over to the family apartment of my bffs (UNC roomie and her family I adore). It was such a treat to drop off my bags and to come back from dropping my car to be told by the doorman that my luggage was already up in the apartment. Hello luxury! Prior to scooting over to UES, I sent several emails and LinkedIn messages. I’m really excited about some roles that also come with a healthy salary of $250K.

I settled in and then I worked on my business idea for 3 hours. Time FLEW by, and I didn’t even notice how long I’d been working on it. Do what you love and the money will follow. What a lovely night at 1148. I have so many happy memories in this apartment, and It feels like such a loving place to start this new Emma era.

Daily Magic 9.17

I woke up early and happy. I had a nice Emma morning, and then by 9AM i was out the door to take Clara (my car) out to live in CT. She can live a nice life down there for a quarter of the cost. I’ll bring my girlie back into the city once i start raking in that $250K salary. I made it out there and back quickly and with ease. Go Northeast Emma.

Old friends: I had lunch with Hayden and met her baby James. What a gift to have a luxurious UES lunch with a BFF from another era in life. She is so relaxed, kind, and the best company. What a gift it is to be in NYC reconnecting with so many people I love. I’ll be sad when she moves to Greenwich, but I can’t wait to connect her with my CT peeps. Gigi can be her CT mom, too.

Dad: I had the most energizing catch up with Dad. I am so lucky to have parents who don’t doubt me and trust that I’m on my way to something wonderful and fulfilling.

Dogs: I walked a friends dog on the Westside highway yesterday. He’s so curious, beautiful, and affectionate. I’d like to get a pet. I love affection. He was so playful, and jumped onto a hot man. He and I had a nice little meet cute. I’ll continue to volunteer to help with Ranger because he’ll probably get me a few dates, tbh. It’s nice talking with and meeting strangers regardless. Dogs are disarming and open up the warmth in people. What special creatures.

I had the most soul giving dinner with my bday twin flame (her half bday is my bday). I’m probably not properly using that. 1:1 connection is one of my favorites. I am so proud of who Lala is and grateful we found time together. She’s kind, adventurous, smart, and fiercely protective. She’s honest and vulnerable about what is top of mind which is refreshing. She reminded me what I deserve and that I should not settle or make excuses for not getting what I want. I learn so much from her, and I am excited to spend more time together cheering one another on. It’s such a gift to have strong cheerleaders as you enter a new phase of life. My heart felt so happy walking away from this meal. Female friendship is truly wonderful, and I’m so lucky to have such inspiring people in my life.

After a night time walk with Ranger, I came back uptown and had a lovely night time chat with big Cwilly. She has been through so much, yet she has one of the warmest and kindest souls. I am so grateful to spend time in her home with her this September. I learn so much from her. It is very special to be in a home and not just a house. 9/18 is my bday and her deceased husbands. There is something really powerful about knowing that we’d both wake up in this apartment on 9/18 to being celebrating a special day. I’m grateful for big cwilly, her big heart, and her gentle advice.

I felt so happy heading to bed. It’s wonderful to have so much love around you as you start a new era. Closing out my 33rd year and onto the next year around the sun. I’ve loved every year of my life, and each year seems to be better than the one before. It always shocks me, but it’s always tree. See you soon 34 year old, Emeline. Big hugs and so much love. XOXO, Emma

Daily Magic 9.18

What an amazing day. I woke up after a luscious night of sleep to my birthday. Big cwilly and I chatted for a bit and she gave me a birthday card before she headed down to the office. We both talked about our upcoming days, and she let me know where all the museum passes are. What a gift – access for free to all the museums in NYC. I can’t wait to take advantage of that. It’s so nice feeling so incredibly welcome in a family home. I’m so glad that she invited me, and that I decided to stay here.

I had a lovely morning snuggled up — journaling, writing, and coming up with a plan of attack for the day. I walked myself to Gristedes and Butterfield’s. I’m going to need to figure out how to ween myself off of Butterfield’s. It’s the best high end market I’ve ever experienced in my life. I talked with my sister the whole time while I was there. It makes my heart happy that we’re beginning to be back in one another lives in a really authentic way.

How I feel about birthdays: I used to loathe birthdays because I disliked the attention. I didn’t like being asked “Did you accomplish everything that you wanted this year?” For some reason, I felt judgment with that question. Am I not where I am supposed to be in life yet? This year felt different. I know and trust that I am exactly where I am supposed to be. I am so at peace with who I am as well as excited about who I am becoming and what lies ahead of me. So much has happened in the past year, but I don’t want a gold star for having a year of growth. Instead, why don’t we use birthdays to celebrate who we are vs. what we’ve done or what we want to do? When I received a bday text instead of a simple thank you, I thought why not respond with love and asking my people to enjoy and be a little more awake. Being alive and leading with love is the most beautiful way to honor me. I responded all day with ” I hope Emeline day is extra magical for you – some giggles, some kindness, and some time outside.” Juju said “the energy is energying.” and “There is a little more electricity in the air today.” The best way to celebrate someone is to take the good bits of how they life their life and to do the same that day. What if we started to position birthdays that way? Every day would be a learning experience and an adventure. 9/19 is my high school friend’s birthday who I associate with tennis. What if on 9/19 I always play tennis? 9/20 is my friend Coco’s birthday. She’s a wonderful singer and as athletic as they come. So what if on Coco’s birthday? We all got outside, ran a little bit, and sang a little bit. Maybe this is a reframe that I’ll start to do. While this a way to give back on your birthday, I think it’s important to also accept the love around you. I struggle with this bit. I am learning to accept love though. One of my cards that I used to send notes on said “when you feel loved, you can do anything”. It’s important that I start to practice what I preach.

A few of my favorites moments of the day: Lindsay, Halsey, Clark, Casey, George, Annie, Milly, Ruth, and Mom all called me. I didn’t talk to all of them on the phone, but how nice for people to take time out of their day to send me love. A beautiful text from Cwilly, whose father shares my birthday was another highlight. It said “I know 34 is going to be the best year yet filled with adventures in NY, passion in your new career, surrounded by love”. Another one said “HBD! To the most special silly giggly princess of them all. You are a gem and an absolute privilege to have in my life! Wishing you all the butterflies today. Thank you for being you, and for being in my life and being the queen of the Emelines.”

Wonderful things are happening for me and around me: Happy frigging birthday to me. Warren who is getting married next week in NY and is currently in South Carolina has the emotional capacity and thoughtfulness to think about me and my new era in NYC. She alerted me that the iconic apt that she’s been subleasing will be up for lease in mid or late October. I locked in a furnished apartment through January because I don’t want to be spending my time on Street Easy instead of pursuits that either make me cash $ or feed the soul. This apartment is in the best location and a gem of an apartment. What a birthday gift! I will do anything in my power to lock it down! What a birthday gift. Things are flowing! Release control and surrender to the flow, baby. Pinch me. I took myself down to the neighborhood, and it already feels like home. I can’t wait!

After this I scooted over to Ainsley’s apartment where I had a lovely night with my girlies. Friends who are adventurous and willing to go into new environments are the best. We had a chic dinner then we scooted over to BK. Just like our friendship the night had range, silliness, dancing, and depth. We seem to cover it all, always. What a gift to have those few special friends with immense range. I’m a firm believer that you shouldn’t expect to get everything from everyone. It’s healthy to realize that people give you different things. There are those rare birds though who see you and know how to love you unconditionally. They can be the friend to have a hilarious night with as well as the friend you cry to. Those friends are special, and always invest time in those friendships. I’m lucky to have quite a few of those in my life, and several in NYC.

Everywhere is a night club. The night ended in a long uber from BK, but it was again a night club. He was playing Mariah Carey for me, and I was singing at the top of my lungs. Life is so much fun, and I could not have had a better birthday if I tried. I feel free, adventurous, and completely at peace with who I am. I’m so excited to see what the next day and the next year brings. I am exactly where I am supposed to be – at home in NYC.

Daily Magic 9.19

I woke up a little groggy on 9.19 after a big night out, but I was ready to seize the day! I caught up on my text messages, journaled, and wrote the daily magic. I met my friend’s housekeeper Ana, and she is so incredibly warm. She offered to do my laundry, but I felt weird letting her do that. I now regret that. Uptown living is luxurious, and I think it’s where I’ll end up buying an apartment in the city. It’s where it makes sense to raise a family, so why not plan for the future?

I dragged my lazy bum to SLT, and man did i struggle. The party pounds are here, and I am sadly very out of shape. This was a nice slap in the face. I’m grateful that I have a body that moves well and has no limitations, but I should honor it a bit more. Little less wine, little more cooking, little more moving. New beginnings, new routines, and new fitness level? Sure!

After SLT, I got a text from a friend of a friend. I’ve met her two times, and she asked me for drinks. It really does warm my heart that people who I don’t know very well quickly appreciate my magic and want me around. I am very lucky to have new and old friends take an interest in me.

I spent the afternoon piddling about before I headed downtown to the one world trade center for a UVA event. The event was not great, but the views were impeccable. UVA really is an amazing place, and I did enjoy hearing about the heart of the school. Selfishly though, I wanted to mix and mingle. Dare I say make a contact who wants to hire me for a lucrative dream job? Ainsley and I went to dinner afterwards which I should’ve declined. We had a nice catch up, but I didn’t need to spend the $. In the end though, I am glad that we did because I am a safe place for her. When she doesn’t feel judged, she’s more vulnerable. It’s fun to see your friends begin to put the wall down.

It took me a minute to get back uptown. I was sad that I was late because I wanted quality time with big cwilly before she leaves town. What a wonderful feeling to miss your roomie? I’m very grateful for her and the wonderful example she sets for creating the life you want. She has so many friends, gives back, and does so many interesting things. Not an all star day, but not a bad day?! On to the next day where I hopefully feel a bit more rested. BTW keep the apartment prayers going. I would be busting at the seams with joy if I end up with that unit. Love you XOXO, Emeline

Daily Magic 9.22

I woke up a little groggy, and a little bit annoyed with my lack of self control. It was not at all necessary to have gone to Nobu last night. I give myself grace because I’ve only been in New York for a week, but it’s important that I don’t go out to dinner every night just because I can. I think new experiences and new environments is where I say yes. Dinner with A for the 3rd time that week when we’re both low energy and exhausted. As I said above, it was a good use of time. I feel better though when I listen to myself and my body. I could’ve used an earlier turn in.

Today is big cwilly bday. To honor her, I thought why not be a little bit more kind and more curious. She didn’t take the card I left her, but just like 9/18 there’s a little bit of extra energy in the air. After an Emma morning, I got myself together and headed out to walk and talk in the park. I got back on the horse re executive search, and I talked to a friend of a friend. She was extremely down to earth, chill, and not the aggressive nature that worries me about search. The piece that stuck out to me about our conversation was that she said it’s an easy job. Do i want an easy job? Is this partially whats been holding me up? I want to have meaning in my life. Would this aid at giving me meaning? I love talking with and connecting people, but would that add meaning? Would I want to get paid for something I enjoy so much in its pure form because it’s simply out of the kindness in my heart? I think i want to be problem solving for connection and loneliness at the end of the day. All in all, I was grateful for the conversation. It was wonderful to be able to take the call walking through central park.

Lunch with W: I went for a long lunch with a younger friend. She’s such an old soul. I can’t believe she’s 26. She’s eager to find love and her person. She’s been single for a decade. I feel for her. We have a lot of similarities, but also a lot of differences. I am so grateful that negative self talk is minimal for me. I sometimes feel guilty that I don’t have the what is wrong with me conversation when it comes to relationships. I’ve never had that conversation. I think especially when it comes to relationships we’re all doing the best that we can. My self doubt seeps in when it comes to the career bit. Is there where I thought i’d be at 34? No, but in the end if I’d taken a more linear route, would I be on the way to an authentic route? I said above the scenic route is the way to go, so why not reframe this year as a scenic route? I’ve learned more than I can imagine. Sometimes, you just need a boost of encouragement from a friend or time to nourish your self.

I scooted back uptown for a quiet night at home. As expected, I took myself to butterfield – a new happy place. I was a productive princess on a Friday night. What a wonderful lesson in how good it feels to listen to what your body and soul feels like you need to do. I was genuinely happy to be snuggled up watching a bradley cooper movie. I saw him on the street today, so it felt particularly fun to watch.

By the way, I didn’t much care about seeing Bradley Cooper. I thought he was just another hot west village dad to be honest. I like that I don’t freak out over stars. We’re all just people at the end of the day doing the best we can. I guess I am becoming a New Yorke not phased by the famous nor the faux butterfly dead on the street.

It was a nice night where I reminded myself how nice it is to simply just be. I went to bed early and had a glorious night of sleep. Great job having a low key day, Emeline. Love you. XOXO.

Daily Magic 9.21

Waking up on a Saturday after staying in on a Friday is magical. I woke up rested, relaxed, and ready to enjoy my own company. My favorite type of Saturday is when I have a big chunk of time to myself and in the late afternoon meet up with friends. This day was precisely that.

Emma time: I woke up, read, watched tv, and wrote some emails I’d been avoiding. I was in a perfectly peaceful and happy productive princess flow. I went to 1230PM SLT, and I made plans with Raj on the way there. The recipe for a great day was right in front of me. I ripped the band aid, and I started to do things that I had been avoiding like job emails and applications. Once I started though, I feel at ease and like this will be something I enjoy yet again. I discovered several roles that I am curious about. What would it look like to be chief of staff at an arts foundation? How fun would that be. There are some really wonderful roles out there. If you’re curious about something, explore it. It’s that simple. When I feel energized and have a strong belief in myself, I can get the whole to do list done in a day. It’s such a good feeling not because of what I crossed off the list, but rather because I did what I told myself I would do. Being there for yourself is step one. Why do we strive to honor our commitments for others before we strive to honor commitments for ourselves? Is it because we think that we have endless time with ourselves and limited time with others? Well, neither are promised. I am coming to learn that cherishing and savoring time with yourself is the secret. I’m likely seen as an extrovert, but I love alone time as well. We’re all different, but I think it’s important to learn and enjoy being alone. There are different types of alone time.

1. productive princess time: I think rest, movement, and using your brain are all productive. When I say I’m having productive princess time, I usually mean that I am crossing through a to do list that gets me closer to goals. The goal could be personal admin in a good place to relieve any anxiety there or sending out emails within my network to get closer to finding the right role. Productive princess time is when I am focused and moving forward as an individual.
2. Relaxation time: This one is the hardest for me. If I am alone, I am often thinking about productive princess time. Isn’t it productive to get lost in a book, movie, or tv show to relax you or teach you something? I want more of this time. It’s funny given I’m not working that I crave more of this time. More sleep and more genuine relaxing – away from the phone, away from the “should I be out”, or “should i be applying for jobs while I watch tv.”
3. Transcendence time: I think we learn by getting out of ourselves. Museums, long walks observing the people around you, and being out in nature are all wonderful uses of Emma time. I’ve yet to invest heavily here, but I hope I will. I often think being more settled allows for more of 2 and 3. I must admit though i feel settled, at peace, and at home within myself. To my surprise, this is allowing me to explore 1-3 in tandem.

Emma time is more than anything listening to myself, being alone with myself to honor what I say I’m going to do, and doing it. By doing what you tell yourself you’re going to do, you start to trust and believe in yourself. What a gift. With more Emma time comes more Emma energy. Feeling my Emma energy is a gift. I had Emma energy on Saturday afternoon. Raj came over for an overdue catch up. I am so proud of how much he observes, learns, and begins to continue to figure out who he is. He really tries to always be a better version of himself in every capacity, and it’s inspiring to be around. He does what he says he’s going to do. It’s wonderful to watch as a friend. We had a bit of a silly drunk day. We didn’t really do anything at all, but hang out amongst our small crew. We played the compliments game, and it felt like a scene of friends. It’s really nice when people really see you and understand you. I felt that on Saturday, but the other piece I felt was a bit of my brat coming out. One of our friends was with who is very much from the same world. I found myself talking about CT and doing the whole do you know this person. I felt icky and snobby. There is definitely an element of keeping up with the Jones’ in NYC and the NE. I can play the game, but this was a good reminder that I really don’t care. Feeling like shit afterwards is information that that’s not true to who I am. I think over time I’ll figure out how to balance this. It’s ok to accept that I enjoy and am part of that world while figuring out how to be my down to earth and accepting self. I don’t want to be known as a bratty rich girl. I know it’s a bit, but I am more than that and I don’t want to lean into that persona. All that said, I forgave myself and came home around 1am. I stayed up way too late watching a movie. I was just having so much fun with myself that I didn’t want to go to bed. I guess that’s the 4th type of alone time – having a really good time alone. Singing, dancing, and laughing. This one is free and full of joy — perhaps my favorite and the most important. All in all, it was a great day where I learned it feels better to do what you say you’ll do and honor who you are in social interactions. Most importantly, it’s key to give yourself grace because we wont always be perfect. I can always be better though. I love and accept myself, and I know that I am committed to always becoming a better person. Great Saturday blend of alone time and friend time. Love you, Emeline and I am so certain NYC was the right choice. XOXO.

Daily Magic 9.22

Well, I woke up hungover and sleepy. I put myself back to bed until 1030/11AM. Typically, I would just let myself lean into the rot day. I didn’t want to though because even if I was nauseous I knew that doing what I told myself I would do would make me feel better than anything else. So, I snuggled up and watched old Emily in Paris while I wrote a ton of emails to delay send for Monday AM. It feels really good to do what I say. One of the best feelings. After I ate both breakfast and lunch at home, I took myself outside for a stroll and a quick visit to Trader Joes on the west side. It still blows my mind how cheap Trader Joes is, but how do I feel about eating frozen food? That is their best stuff, and the produce is garbage. I think i’ve ultimately decided that having a few frozen meals in the freezer are better than ordering $ delivery. Balance, baby. I stopped by Rachel’s apartment to fetch something she printed out for me. She cracks me up. She really has the best time with herself. She’d been to the plant store and was deep into a green thumb day. She doesn’t watch tv, and she is only finding easy and not expensive ways to entertain herself. I envy this in her. She has the curiosity of an ADHD person, but the follow through of a CEO. She’ll lead people one day. She’s kind, smart, and curious. It’s fun to watch your friends grow into who they are supposed to be. I was throughly entertained by her story about falling in love with the 60 year old man at the plant shop. I had to go though to meet someone back at the apt who was going to test drive a sofa that he might order.

The sofa situation: I met this man the week prior at a golf tournament. He’s tall, successful, kind, but not a looker. More than that, he’s more country club than I’m interested in. I want the unicorn – you teeter in and out of that life but golf is not by any means critical to your identity. He’s out there. I can already think of 2-3 of them off the top of my head. A free spirit who dabbles with that. Anyways, it was a hilarious encounter. I’m not interested in him, but I’ll happily reach out to be his friend when I move around the corner from him. Very sweet of big cwilly though to have me top of mind when it comes to dating.

After the sofa situation, I took myself out for a walk and to grab Butterfields. A man stopped me on the street while I was on the phone with my Mom and said “you have the most sensual and sexy walk.” He was an old waspy time man with a gentle nature, so I wasn’t at all creeped out. He proceeded to tell me he was the original marlboro man. You could tell he’d been good looking when he was young. Should that have creeped me out? Why am I not creeped out by a waspy looking old man? Should I have been? Regardless, I laughed at the interaction. I am the slowest walker. It drives many people in my life crazy. I have often been made fun of for my walk as well. I’ve been shaking it a bit even as a young girl. Oops. It’s just how my body naturally moves? I came back to the apt and relaxed for the night – few phone catch ups and then I just chilled. I thought about more productive princess time, but I decided that relaxation time would be of better use to me. Big cwilly came home and we watched tv together for a bit. It’s nice to have company when you’re used to being alone on a Sunday night.

A wonderful Sunday that I typically would’ve wasted because of my hangover. Thank you for teaching me the importance of not wasting the day even if I am slightly nauseous. Even a day not set up for rainbows and butterflies has joy in it. A nice way to end and start the week. Sending big hugs and so much love. XOXO, Emeline

Daily Magic 09.23

Having a productive Sunday sets the week up for success. I woke up ready to seize the day. I walked around the park, did computer work, and took myself downtown to take care of Wyndham’s dog.

It’s all about energy: As I suspected, they always come back. I got a text asking if I would be a +1 for a VC dinner. I wanted to say no, but I need to let life flow in NYC and meet new people. You never know where a job might turn up?

Be authentic and confident: I sat at a table with people who are versed in cybersecurity and VC. Two worlds that I don’t know a ton about, but I think it’s important to always be learning. I showed up confident, happy, and curious. I was an immediate hit, and I loved the people who I met. They were all connectors and ready to connect me with others. What a gift.

Spend time with your best friends: Some people simply feel like home which can make it hard to leave. We stayed out way too late, but we missed one another. We also haven’t decided what we are to one another, but I do know that focusing on me is the right move. I am in this incredible flow where I simply trust that things will work out, but I also need to reserve time to think and work hard. People can feel when you are in a good energetic flow and when they might begin to lose you. Create a life that you want, and see who fits in and helps you continue to move forward. No one sees me or understands me better than this human. We’re both free spirited, but I think I’m ready to focus on building structure. It’s great to have fun and be curious, but shouldn’t life have meaning too? It’s harder to live a meaningful life hungover. I don’t want to be able to go out on a Monday night. There needs to be more accountability. I need purpose because I don’t want to waste a second of any day. There’s too much to learn, contribute, and create. I refuse to wake up in 3 years or even 3 days feeling like I’m not moving forward.

At the end of the day, meeting strangers who told me that I am amazing, smart, cerebral, and can do anything is good for the ego. I needed that boost. Being told that my best friend and sometimes love interest is planning to move to New York was a little bit shocking. I hope he moves for him and not for me. I can’t fix him only he can. While I know that I love him and have more fun with him than anyone else, I do know that we party too much together. I want to get to the point where we have our adventurous spirit, but we still sleep and we still work incredibly hard. If we can make that pivot, I think we could create the most beautiful life together. We want the same things, but I am not going to wait around. I’m going to start creating that life for myself and opening my heart to people who already live in New York. We can enjoy one another and smooch in the mean time, but I’m focusing on me and going home early and with less alcohol in my system.

I left the evening thinking I should think about how I spend my time more. I love having fun, but sometimes is it too much and is it moving me forward? Part of Monday night moved me forward, part of it didn’t. Or maybe all of it did? What I do know is it doesn’t feel good that I didn’t do what I set out to do in the first few days of the week. It’s time to get my shit together again because I want to be someone who does what I say I’m going to do. This was an important lesson in how I need to create balance and lower my alcohol intake. Everyday is an opportunity to make a choice. I don’t regret my choices, but I am glad that I am taking the time to examine the. Time to pivot.

Daily Magic 9.24

I woke up a bit angry on Tuesday. I was tired, hungover, and knew I wasn’t up for being a productive princess. It’s important to give yourself grace. I did keep my plans for 1030AM pilates and hang with Hayden.

Get outside of yourself: Even if you are hungover, get moving! Pilates was hard, but it felt good to move. Hayden talked to me about whats going on with their dog, and it reminded me how you simply never know what people struggle with. She also was telling me how she’s going to take the night nurse to lunch on her last day. She’s such a kind human, and I am so grateful to have her back in my life.

Surprises of New York: As we walked further uptown, we walked past sex and the city filming. It was so fun to see that, and to be a part of something with all of the other bystanders watching. Little things like that make me really love New York.

Seize the day: Another opportunity to join a VC event. It’s fun to go learn and see how the VC world works. I definitely find it fun, but I definitely can’t be my best when I’m tired and hungover. I’m grateful that I was invited to tag along on this. I met someone who I find very interesting and impressive, and who I hope I have the courage to follow up with re: opportunities.

Enjoy 1:1 time : From 330pm to 12AM it was just the two of us. We bopped around New York – laughing, drinking, smooching, and talking about life. We walked by my new apartment. We had such a fun day. He’s so worried I’m going to get hit by a car. It cracks me up. I am aloof, but I’ll be fine. It was just one of those New York days where you explore the city while getting lost in one another and have a magnetic energy together that people around you are attracted to. We were truly a hit everywhere we went. This is not new for the two of us, and it seems to be driven by my energy. He’s a charmer who has broken many hearts and is loved by all who know him, but it seems to be me who puts the energy over the edge. Go Emma.

Ear Inn: We shared a pot pie at ear inn, and our waitress was obsessed with us. We talked to all the tables around us. We colored. We talked about our relationship. We made out, and people in the corner cheered. He told me I’ll be a wonderful mother and that my kids will probably be reggae stars. He told me I’m his best friend. I met some of his close friends. I loved them, and I wished we’d had more time with them. He said he was glad it’d just been the two of us. We have all the makings to fall deeply in love with one another in New York or honestly anywhere. Will we have the guts to do it? Gotta love yourself first. Words are nice, but the best feeling is when what you do and what you say are alignment. It’s nice when someone else is aligned in that way, but the most freeing is when I am aligned in that way with myself. I lost that a bit by being a party girl this week. That’s ok, but I am going to prioritize continuing to learn to adore who I am and to honor my commitments with myself. I already do adore myself honestly, but I think the next step is to be determined and focused on building career, friendships, and community. With a healthy dose of sleep and exercise, the rest will follow. I don’t know if it will or won’t be him, and that’s ok. I’m not worried about it because I feel so at peace and confident in myself, which he coincidentally noticed. He told me he could tell I’m incredibly at peace and doing my thing. I know that I need to pour the love, energy, and focus into myself more than anything. I want a job and to be contributing again. That’s my top priority. Because it’s very clear that I will fall madly in love, but to show myself love I need to be grounded and giving just as much back to myself. It’s intoxicating, but it certainly is distracting. Balance is tough, man. It’s a nice cherry on top that I am inspiring someone I love to start to figure out who and what he wants to be. I am a leader, and I always have been. You have to lead yourself first though. Going for it and just moving to NYC was step one. I’m grateful for Emma energy flowing and for our time together. It was magical as always, but I most grateful that I learned nothing is worth abandoning my goals and what I need to do for me first. All that to say, I got home by 1230/1 which is late, but it was a special day that I don’t even slightly regret. I know I won’t forget that day. One of those special loving days.

Daily Magic 9.25

Today was a bit frustrating. I woke up early, and started to be a productive princess. It didn’t last long because I was so exhausted from the past whirlwind 36 hours. I felt anxious, and a little bit annoyed. Lessons learned: Sleep is key. Prioritizing me is the most important thing in the world, and it will always be tempting to swim in someone else’s stuff vs. holding space. I’ve shifted into holding space vs. swimming in it. I need to swim in my stuff, and simply hold space for others. We all have to heal ourselves. We can be patient, hold space, and inspire others to do so for themselves. That’s the most loving approach.

This was the first day in a while that I felt badly about myself, and I don’t want to feel this way again. I am starting to feel that it has been almost a year since i’ve worked. Do people view me as a lazy indulgent rich kid? I know in my heart that I am not, and that this has been one of the most productive years of my life. I can’t even believe what I’ve learned and who I’ve started to become in such a short span of time. While this is great, how do i put into words and explain that in an interview? It’s time to tunnel focus on career. I miss it deeply, and I know that I am capable of being whoever I want to be and contributing in a way that will align deeply with who I am. It’s time to get incredibly focused, and I’m excited for this. The challenge is going to be balancing a bit of travel in October with productivity. It might be a little bit tough, but I view it as an opportunity to show myself that I can create structure, routine, and a commitment to myself while on the go. It’s time to prove to myself that I am, and can fully be who I want to be.

I felt like shit, but I didn’t want to renege on my drink plans with a friend. I knew the longer I wallowed, the shittier the day was going to be. So, I got myself off my bum and I headed downtown to check out a market for summer roll recon. I was candidly unimpressed, and I am convinced that I can create a better lunch option. I am obsessed with this idea. Is there a world in which I can pursue summer roll entrepreneurship while being a chief of staff for a foundation? How much fun would that be? Time to get going! It was good to get outside, and out of myself. Instead of just feeling off and letting myself become anxious, I texted my energy healer for a tune up. We tried to connect while I was sitting in a park in battery park. It was a nice park, but the connection wasn’t working. It worked out for the best though because I would’ve felt rushed/anxious during the session with 530 plans in another part of the city. Luckily, she said she could squeeze me in around 8PM. Perfection.

Friends of best friends: I had the nicest time at drinks, and I am so glad that I went. Conversation was so wonderful, and it’s so nice to have vulnerable and honest conversation. We talked about a pull towards entrepreneurship, but also craving structure and collaboration. It’s lonely to found something alone. Should I be looking for a co-founder? Can I do both? I think I can side entrepreneur for a bit, but I don’t want to abandon the idea. I am certain that it will work. It was really nice to have a really human conversation about this. She’s a kind soul, and soon to be a neighbor. It’s also cool to listen to a friend who has no interest in settling in her personal. The theme interestingly across the conversation was the importance of feeling like yourself in a relationship. This has been the theme of the week it seems. The best relationship is going to be where you feel the most like yourself and where the relationship helps you move yourself forward as an an individual. You want to feel safe, seen, and secure. The best friends are the ones who push you to prioritize yourself above else. You have to believe it’s ok to be selfish. Speaking of selfish… I walked past a guy on the street who said to me “You are so selfish, ma’am.” My immediate reaction was thank you I’ve been working on this. A little reminder from the universe that it’s important to be selfish. Perhaps we should reframe selfish? Is one of the problems with society that we’re not selfish enough? We’re constantly abandoning what we tell ourselves we will do. We often abandon this before we abandon what we told someone else we would do. I’m learning that honoring yourself release anxiety more than anything else. The other big topic was the day to day matters in a relationship. How do you want to spend a Saturday? Are you a home body? Are you spontaneous? Life happens in the everyday moments of life. In that conversation, I realized that I have someone in my life who is aligned in that way. Tuesday night we were giggling at dinner speaking in silly accents one moment, talking about our relationship the next moment, and wishing we’d realized there was a rangers game that we could’ve gone to that night. Life is an adventure if you find the right person to do that with. Life is adventure with myself. I have that, but I need the accountability to move forward and contribute. Again, I don’t just want to be happy. I want to lead a meaningful life which requires focus and sleep. I want to be with someone who also wants to lead a meaningful life and contribute to society. I do think there is some truth that being in New York pushes you to have your shit together. If you’re genuinely curious and want to explore all that the city has to offer, you will not only want to contribute to what this city stands for but you also will want to contribute to society in a meaningful way. People are interesting here, and they help you realize that to be adventurous in a productive way you need the stability too. What a gift this place is to put things in perspective for me. I felt back to me on the way back uptown for my energy healer. We had a great session. She could feel that I was at peace, but that my energy was just low. So she fixed me and got things flowing again. Sleep is important. Choosing yourself is important. I think the most freeing thing that I’ve realized in the past month is that peoples reactions are a reflection of them. It has nothing to do with me? Once you realize that, it’s much easier to flow through life. It was a great session. She told me she was proud of me, and that I am an entirely different person from the one she met in Austin a few years ago. I may not be working yet, but I haven’t run into waking up 3 years later and thinking have I not moved forward. It’s ok for moving forward to not look the same for all of us. I may not be married, have kids, or settled in a career, but I think i’ve changed and had more growth in the past 3 years than I could’ve ever imagined. I’m glad things sorted out this way because i’ve learned to look inward and find peace, fun, adventure, and love with myself. What a gift to find at such a young age. After finishing up with Sharon, big cwilly got home from the ballet. We had a nice catch up before bed. She talked about being married to the life of the party and the pros and cons. It was timely given the life of the party tends to be who I choose. My college boyfriend was the life of the party, but he ultimately grew up after a bit. It’s not just that I pick the life of the party. I, too, can be the life of the party. I am multi-faceted and know that I am more than that. I can’t wait to show myself what else I can do, and I am so grateful to have a deep belief in myself. Time to turn the page. I am so proud that I can reflect, leverage tools that I know work, and quickly come back to myself. I didn’t even waste a day coming back to myself. Sending big hugs and so much love. XOXO.

Daily Magic 9.27

What a magical day! I had a delicious Wednesday night sleep that I really needed after an aggressive start to the week. I felt like me this morning, and I was ready to get going creating the life that I want. I woke up, and I stripped the sheets for a laundry day. I went into the living room for Emma morning, which was a nice change of pace. Emma morning consists of daily gratitude, productivity planner, free hand journaling (usually!), reading the news, and doing strands.

It’s not aggressive to follow up: I followed up with a friend about the potential dream apartment. He said he’d let me know later. He said it’s a 50-50 chance it’s mine. It fell in my lap, so 50-50 odds are better than my current plan of a furnished apartment for the next few months. I’m grateful for the possibility, and I trust that it will unfold in my best interest.

Do what fills you up: I hadn’t written since Monday, and it felt good to catch up and reflect on the past few days. It’s grounding for me, and it’s a good reminder to consistently commit to the things that I know energize me. When I’m energized, I don’t doubt myself, and I know that I can be anything.

Keeping up with friends is important, but I need to protect my time: I have the time to fill people in on how I’m feeling and how I’m doing. I’m sick of talking and want to take action to move forward. It seems small, but simply telling a friend I can’t talk because I need to focus. This is more of what I need and want to do. Just because I don’t have a job doesn’t mean my time is less precious? I am starting to feel a little anxiety and judgment that it’s been a year of unemployment. I know in my heart that it’s been the most productive year for me to date, but I need to leave in reality. A potential business partner or employer does not have a chance to know my heart and to know this year will lead me to show up better in my work. My task now is to figure out how to tell that story which I know that I can.

Sometimes you just need to ACT: I scheduled a meeting with an old boss for Monday that I am excited about, an interview to become a mentor in NYC, and time to reconnect with a contact who was interested in having me work with him a few months ago. It feels good to spend my time doing things that move me forward.

Good friends are a gift, and will follow your lead: I caught up with Caroline, as well as R and A today. They all wanted an update on my love life. I was fine to give, but I am sick of the air time. I told them where my head was, and I was applauded for my maturity, loving nature, and approach. It’s clear that it’s time to focus on me, and I’m genuinely so excited to do so. I am at peace, and I know that I am in the right place and at the right time. When you love and accept someone fully, you have patience. I suppose having patience with yourself is what peace feels like? This is how I feel, and I am so grateful.

Energy is everything: I have become Juju’s favorite hobby and interest. It’s so incredibly loving on her end, and I am so grateful to have a friend who thinks about me so often. She wants me to have everything, and to live my best life. She thinks about ways to help. She sometimes gets fixated on a small thing like my instagram profile picture. I’m sorry you need to get rid of that wig picture, and put something up that says hi i’m emma and I am stunning. In response, I told her I’d consider changing it for her birthday. I probably won’t because I believe you have to be authentic to who you are. Well, less than 24 hours after my energy tune up, the emma energy was energy-ing. I walked to the subway to go to a restaurant to try some green sauce that I might help them commercialize. It was a glorious commute.

Energy is swag: It was a rainy day, but I was feeling like sunshine. I was crossing Madison, and a man stopped me to ask “Is this the right way to cross town?”. To which I told him no, and he proceeded to tell me he just needed an excuse to talk to the most beautiful woman in NYC. I loved his confidence, but I had no interest in him. He walked with me for a couple of blocks, and he asked for my instagram handle. I fibbed and told him I was in a relationship. He said we could be friends till then in case that guy made the biggest mistake of his life. He saw the orange wig on my instagram, and said oh wow you’re goofy! He seemed to fancy it, and then told me he was back to fetch his BMW. Good luck out there man and thank you for the validation that energy is it. Sorry, juju. After this encounter, I saw two men in couples staring at me. I stare at people all the time with no intentions, so it doesn’t mean anything. It just made me laugh because they both made sure probably unconsciously to show me their ring. The whole encounter left me wondering whether I should be more confident and approach strangers more often in NYC? Right after this thought, I saw a man with a UVA hat and said go hoos. He smiled, and I smiled. All it takes is a little bit of courage to create everyday connection. Then, a few minutes later, I saw waspy man in a Sea Island. I happened to be in a Sea Island sweatshirt, so I said I like your hat and pointed to my sweatshirt and said we’re twins. He also smiled. You never know who might stop for a little bit more conversation and end up being a key player in my life. A good lesson to be myself and let life flow from moments like this.

I came back the apartment and tried the green sauce. Once I tried the sauce, I reached out to be connected. Why not help this company while I have the time? It’s good to get my brain thinking and problem solving. As I start to do my due diligence again, It’s becoming clear to me that I am going to take an entrepreneurial path. Follow your curiosity. I am convinced that my idea will work, and I am ready to get things going. I am someone who does everything all at once, so why not build a brand and a new concept while I also search for a chief of staff role at a non-profit. This could be the perfect pair in my opinion. Did I just find the secret sauce for me? Potentially, oui oui.

The sauce is good, and I will definitely meet with him. It’ll be a mutually beneficial conversation as there is a lot that I can learn from him as well. The juices were flowing after this, and I reached out to the man that I met at the VC conference who is focused on enabling franchises via tech. I LOVE this concept, and think there’s so much value to be had here to make franchising more accessible. He also mentioned a lot of side hustles that sound like very low effort that might be worth getting into. I also think that he’ll also be a helpful resource for me as I think about paths to scalability.

Once I’m determined, I know that I’ll find my way to the people who I need to meet with. This is going to be FUN. I am so excited. After a quick call with a friend to talk about this, I scurried off to SLT. After SLT, I went to Butterfields to get dinner for Caroline and me. I was in there forever as expected, and I ended up having a really nice chat with Adrians at checkout. I practiced what I preach and treated him like the lovely individual that he is. Everyone is a human. Treat them as such. I can’t wait to go back and see him tomorrow. It was a funny conversation about butterflies and bees. I appreciated it even if I probably pissed off the Upper East Siders waiting in line. Life is short. Be a kind one.

I had a nice night catching up with Caroline. We’ve been distant for a bit now, but quality time brings you right back to one another. What a gift. I’m grateful for the quality time this weekend. It was special to feel like best friends again.